How The Art of Asking led to me talking about Tampa by Alissa Nutting, Morrissey's novel and the Bad Sex in Fiction Awards on LitReactor's Unprintable podcast

I'm back home from California, enjoying being back in my own bed, in my chilly in certain spots but lovely new home, and catching up on blog posts and writing. I had meant to share a fun interview I did recently, and a little backstory on how it happened, and now I am.

This podcast interview was a huge honor, because it's with a podcast and company I greatly admire, and a lesson in Amanda Palmer's book title The Art of Asking, one I've previously put into action as well. It's probably the #1 business/creativity book in my life in terms of the profound effect it's had (close second, or in the running for #1, is Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear by Elizabeth Gilbert). I'm not saying I'm in any other way like Amanda Palmer, who I don't even know that much about beyond reading the book, but I am saying the principles of her approach to asking have stayed with me ever since I read it and I try to remember them when I'm going after something I want, or I'm nervous about making a request, even though it feels utterly right in my heart.

I will save my "why I believe in DIY author self-promotion" rant for another day, but suffice it to say, while I used to wait for opportunities to magically appear in front of me, now I go after opportunities. I feel I owe it to myself and my business, and I believe in my message enough, and my offerings (like my upcoming LitReactor online erotica class, hint hint!) to want to share them with the world, and by "the world," I mean the world beyond people who might already know who I am (like you, my wonderful, patient with my meanderings blog readers). Especially when I become a fan of a podcast, which often feels more intimate to me than reading, because I'm hearing someone's voice, I'm hearing how they ask questions, how they pause and phrase things, how they laugh, I tend to think about what it would be like to be a guest. In many cases, that wouldn't make sense, because it's not about what I do, but when it is, I let that image linger a little longer and if that image like it would make sense, I let myself envision it happening, which makes the ask a lot easier.

Gaining that perspective, that I'm coming from a place of passion about my work and belief in its power and importance and in the case of my teaching, effectiveness, changed my sense of asking for things from being rude and pushy to simply being one creative businesswoman asking someone else to share in a mutually beneficial arrangement, while knowing full well they may say no. I don't invest my ego or my sense of self-worth in the answer; I simply see it as one small step toward following my dreams.

Plus, in 2015 podcasts sort of took over my life. I devoured so many new ones and woke up eager to listen to whatever was on tap that day. I haven't been listening as much in 2016 mainly because I was busy moving and have had lots of deadlines and I can't seem to both write and listen to podcasts. I can listen to music, but podcasts require another level of concentration. So when it came to thinking about promoting my new book and my upcoming class, being interviewed on podcasts seems like a fitting next step. Oh, and I got on Girl Boner podcast by asking too. I'm proof that it works.

TL:DR I got over my qualms about sounding pompous or overly entitled and asked politely if I could be interviewed on LitReactor's Unprintable podcast, which I only recently found out existed but quickly became fascinated by (as a book lover, how could I not enjoy hearing what the hosts are reading each episode, told in a manner that conveys of course we're reading, we're always reading).



They said yes and here's our episode (yes, that's me and Morrissey pictured above, and we talk about and laugh at a snippet from his novel Bad Sex in Fiction award winning List of the Lost, definitely not something teen me would have thought I'd ever do when I saw him in concert).

Not only did they say yes, they put me on with co-hosts Cath Murphy, who also is one half of the must-listen Domestic Hell podcast (their current episode is on "Granny Vajazzling," which should really tell you whether you're immediately intrigued or not), and whose accent I adore, and LitReactor class facilitator and writer Renee Asher Pickup, for the first all-female Unprintable show. It was so much fun, and while at the top it was suggested we go for 30 minutes, we babbled on for an hour and 15 minutes, and I know I could have kept on talking with these wonderful women for way longer.

It was a sprawling, sometimes hilarious, thoughtful discussion, about sexism in book criticism and mansplaining, Morrissey's purple prose, how Tampa by Alissa Nutting was treated by the media, whether the Bad Sex in Fiction Awards are good for writing, the use of pseudonyms, tattoos, and more. For me, it felt like talking to two old friends, even though I'd never spoken to them before save for a very quick Skype call to go over things a few weeks prior.

Again, in case you missed it the first time: It would never have happened if I hadn't asked. Am I saying you'll get everything you ask for just by asking? No, but I am saying that asking is the first step. Being prepared for rejection is part and parcel of asking, and I'll revisit that topic, but for now, I definitely recommend tuning in and you can subscribe to the Unprintable podcast in iTunes. If you like books and reading, I'm pretty sure you'll like it.

So now I will apply the magic of asking again: if you know anyone who might be interested in my upcoming LitReactor 4-week online Between the Sheets erotica writing class, please pass on the info! This will be my sixth time teaching it, and right now I'm preparing for it by researching and interviewing new literary agents, publishers, editors and authors because I aim to make each class even more informative than the next. In addition to all the stated weekly lectures and assignments, I bring students over a dozen exclusive interviews with erotica publishing insiders designed to help you get published and get your publishing questions answered. Plus I've learned so much about what's happening in my industry that I wouldn't have known otherwise, and found great books to read, like Everything I Left Unsaid by M. O'Keefe, which I'm reading now on the recommendation of the agent who sold it, who I interview for the class.

Speaking of which: I love when students come in with questions! But I also appreciate that four weeks is a good amount of time to develop even more, and that's part of the joy of this class: you can figure out what you want to know as you go along. Plus after it's over, you'll get an invitation to my private online group for erotica writing student alumni where I share writing news and resources, and students ask questions and continue the community that's often formed in the classes. The class is limited to 16 people so everyone can receive as much attention and feedback as they deserve. Questions about the class? Email rachelkb at gmail.com with "LitReactor" in the subject line.

Sex, Romance, Champagne, Cupcakes! February 1st, Los Angeles, Coco de Mer reading!

I'm doing a mini West Coast tour, which hits Good Vibrations in Berkeley January 27th, Booksmith January 28th (with Violet Blue, rest of lineup TBA for both of these!) and February 1st in LA at Coco de Mer. Other events around my book Gotta Have It: 69 Stories of Sudden Sex are also in the works for a range of locations, from Minneapolis to the UK, but first I have to get through this crazy month. Feel free to tell your Facebook friends and grab this Flickr photo and let people know about this LA reading!



And our books...links below are to Amazon via my affiliate link, as are all Amazon links on this blog (Girlvert and Shameless will be out in January, you can pre-order), but I encourage you to buy this, of course, at Coco de Mer at our reading and get them signed, or any of your local bookstores. And don't forget, through December 31st, my publisher Cleis Press is having a 20% off sale!


The Lovers by Eden Bradley (more info at www.edenbradley.com)


Best Bondage Erotica 2011 edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel (more info at www.bestbondageerotica.com


Shameless by Pamela Madsen (more info at www.beingshameless.com)


Girlvert: A Porno Memoir by Oriana Small, aka Ashley Blue (more info at daveaz.com/oriana)

Why I believe in DIY PR

As I posted a while ago, I briefly flirted with hiring a publicist for In The Flesh. I did in fact do so and probably due to my last minuteness, we got zero hits and I was out some cash. But it reinforced for me that though sometimes it makes me want to crawl under a rock, I've found that the best PR efforts for me are DIY all the way. This is not a scientific study or anything, just my observations from running readings for the last 7 years. The very first one I organized was at Bluestockings in 2001 for Best Lesbian Erotica 2001, and then right after for Faster Pussycats, neither of which I edited.

But those were the first books to publish my stories and I wanted to make sure they got heard. Since then, I've pretty much done most of my publicity stuff on my own. I do have publicists at my various publishers, but when you're with small presses, I think one of the first things you learn is that you have more time and energy and knowledge to devote to your projects than they do. Perhaps at a big house too, I wouldn't really know about that.

Anyway, I was reminded of that today when via a simple email, our cupcake blogiversary party got posted about on Grub Street (New York magazine's food blog) and Serious Eats.



That's also how I've gotten In The Flesh into the New York Times's UrbanEye newsletter. I printed out and mailed the details to Melena Ryzik. Or I sent an email to Flavorpill. I try so hard not to pester peopel, which is why for a long time I didn't even sent out my newsletter (you can sign up for it here). But now that I have

To me, so much of it is simply about being available, not pestering, being nice, and having your information ready. I got someone to make a graphic for our party specifically so that we could give that out to other blogs. Sometimes it's frustrating because I have no idea if something like blogging about a specific topic reaches anyone at all. But it's free, right? I love that part of it, that at least I can get the basics of my books up and out there where people can read and click and find out more. I truly think that's what will keep someone's interest, even if they don't buy a given book. And on my better days I think that's great. On the days when I wish my royalty statements were higher, I don't really care, I just want more sales, but ultimately, this is the wrong business to get rich from, and I know that, and am just happy I get paid to write and edit at all.

Often I can't really keep up. I have wanted to hand over some of the PR duties for In The Flesh to my assistant for a while, but I can't quite let go. I really want the Susie Bright event to blow the hell up, and I'm sure it will, because she's Susie, but still, I can't rely on that in the middle of winter.

I read on Julia Allison's blog about this book Dirty Little Secrets of Buzz, and as I tend to do, clicked on over to Amazon and bought it. It's a quick read, and author David Seaman is known for things like the Free Paris (Hilton) campaign and other media-savvy ones. It's a little different if you're with indie presses trying to build a writing/blogging name for yourself, but similar nonetheless.



I really liked the book, and while a lot of it isn't for me, a lot of it opened my eyes. I was stunned when I read on Twanna Hines's blog that she got an audio transcript of her Sirius Radio appearance and posted it. Brilliant! Yet how many times have I been on Derek and Romaine, plus a few other Sirius shows, and the thought had not even occurred to me. In part, I hate the sound of my own voice, but you know what, if I'm gonna do this thing, I need to do it right.

I think there are of course limits to DIY PR and if I had the funds, I'd consider hiring someone. But the fact of the matter is, I don't. I'll be gearing up to do more book trailers in 2009, even though I've yet to see whether they boosted the sales for Spanked or not. Why? Because it's not just about the sales of any one book. Seaman reinforced that for me. It's about the whole package, about building everything together.

I think where I get into trouble is where I doubt what I'm doing in the first place; that makes it very hard to be out there self-promoting. Quite often I wish what I did were a little more family friendly. I wish I didn't have that reflex that cringes and whispers when I tell people what I do. Not always, but still, working at Penthouse Variations and editing books like Spanked and Crossdressing is not the same as being an administrative assistant, my previous job, or a lawyer, my once-upon-a-time future job. I usually get over that fairly quickly, but I also know that there's a part of me, a strong part, that wants to do something else. Something more PG, something new, something a little less sex-centered. What that is, I don't know yet, but I'm trying desperately to figure that out.

Sometimes I feel like I have a bazillion things to learn and I'll never catch up, and probably the latter half of that is true. One can never truly be "caught up" because there are an infinite number of websites to read, not to mention books, magazines...that's a futile effort, but still, I am trying to become a little more tech savvy. I hate wanting to do things and not knowing how. I'm pretty much technologically inept. I know the barest of bare minimums of HTML. I've been reading the book Blog Blazers, and though it's meant to be educational and inspirational, I think, I have a feeling that if I'd read it before I started blogging I'd never have started. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by the giant gap between what I want to accomplish and what I seem capable of. Some months my website gets updated, some it doesn't. Some months In The Flesh's info is out at every possible site and publication I can think of, but more often, that languishes. It's a lot and I often am not sure I'm up to any of it. Yet I'm fired up too because I'm excited about the work I'm putting out.

I learn on the job quite well. For the 2+ years I wrote my Lusty Lady column for The Village Voice, I caught on real fast that it wasn't enough just to write it, for me. I made sure to send that link to carefully targeted sites and blogs, and it worked. I'm learning that with Flickr, even though my personal account is now moderated to my extreme aggravation. I'm learning to seek out groups and post my photos all the hell over the place. I learned from my friend Aaron that Creative Commons is my friend.

And I think that's the main thing about doing your own PR: it's a constant learning process. It never ends. Quite often things pop up out of nowhere and I feel so blessed, like this interview on Capessa but I also think those things happen because I'm pursuing things that I believe in, that matter to me. I feel like I barely know a thing, and yet something I'm doing does work. As I book my SXSW panel (almost done!), I know there's more of that ahead, and for me the challenge is to conserve my energy for when I'm in the mood to brainstorm and email and research and find every possible venue I could send something to, and the times when I just want to curl under my blanket with a good book.

Anyway, I've babbled too long. I was just excited and am so thrilled about all the cupcakes we're gonna have tomorrow and all the prizes we're giving away. Please join us tomorrow at White Rabbit, 145 East Houston Street, NYC, from 6-9. It's free and there are going to be more cupcakes than you can possibly eat.

Radar and Fleshbot awesomeness and shameless self-promotion the hard way

Radar went to a recent Playgirl party and reviewed the mag, giving a mention to my anthology Naughty Spanking Stories from A to Z.



And the fabulous folks at crazy hot Fleshbot blogged my He's on Top/She's on Top kinky virtual book tour! It starts this Sunday, April Fool's Day (for real) over at Viviane's Sex Carnival. From April 1st through May 5th, you'll get giveaways, reviews, excerpts, and deep thoughts about dominance and submission!



When I was in Oregon people kept asking about my book "tour." I don't think they quite understand that I pay my own way for all my travel, and bought 90 extra copies each of my books to do this promotion and a lot of other promo (like take an ad out on Susie Bright's blog. Hopefully it'll pay off, but I've spent out most of my advance. By choice; it's a calculated risk, one I can take because I have other money coming in and because, frankly, otherwise I don't really know how to spread the word about my books. I feel like I've been gifted with these brilliant, gorgeous covers, and I'm so proud of every single dirty story in these two; there's no filler, no iffiness, no things I'm not that cool with. Recently, another publisher I'd worked with in the past, Alyson, chose to cancel one of the anthologies I co-edited for them, called Second Skin. I was sad, because my co-editor and I put a lot of work into it and the three previous books in the Fetish Chest series, but at the same time, it made me realize that publishers, especially ones new to the erotica field, don't always know what they're doing and can come up with unsellable ideas just as easily as us authors can. When you're really broke or in debt, you have to jump at any opportunity given to you, and I did, and we put those first three out at breakneck speed. I have my own ideas about why they didn't sell all that well, largely to do with the covers, content (an equal mix of straight, lesbian, and gay erotica) and placement (I believe they are in the gay/lesbian section of most stores, due to being published by Alyson, but am not really sure). I still think those are great books but have to put my energies into the ones I'm most passionate about. I'll also always be the kind of person who wants to know what's being said/written about me, and wants to take an active part in the publicity process. I know that can only be a boon next year when working with Bantam (part of Random House) to promote my first novel, Everything But... I'm not saying I know everything, but I do feel that I know the erotica market pretty damn well, both in terms of selling my work, editing anthologies, and figuring out which media outlets might bite.

I hear and observe a lot of authors pretty much leaving everything up to someone else, and I can't speak for them, but for me, that'd be a mistake. I'm a control freak about a lot of things and I want to know what's happening with my books, and also, for me, I got into all this not so much to make money (though clearly I want that), but because it's something important to me. Though my erotica has largely, though not entirely, shifted from true, personal stories to actual fiction, it's still me writing it, and I still cover topics I care about. I miss the sex journalism I used to do but am looking for new outlets for that, but am also welcoming the freedom fiction gives me. Sometimes it is a tough balance between the creative work and the marketing work, but I also find a real satisfaction in it. Plus I get to indulge my post office fetish and feel a little bit more connected to my readers. Sending out postcards all over the country has been really cool and whether or not those people buy books, I like having a little piece of something I created to hand out. For me, that is always the most exciting part, to take an idea from the mere idea stage and turn it into something people can hold in their hands, can savor, can jerk off to. I sometimes forget that that's what erotica is for, which sounds odd, I know, but I'm in it and surrounded by it all the time, so it's rarer now that I get so lost in it, but show me a good story, and my body reacts. I think these books tap into really elemental, key parts of some people's sexuality - at least, I hope they do - and knowing that, I hope I've done them justice. All this to say that I'm very invested in how my books do, not just for ego or financial purposes, but because they're a part of me. They're my babies, though I think I am definitely playing favorites with my books much more than I will do with my babies. Yes, I want a couple of those someday too. Like three, or four.

I think doing your own publicity, as my friend Audacia Ray has written about, teaches you about what works and what doesn't. It allows you to try innovations like this virtual book tour, and I think there is also something about the personal contact, as opposed to the publicist pitch, that can help. I deal with publicists about book reviews all the time and they're courteous and helpful, and refer people to my books' publicists when I need to, but even leaving aside my post office fetish, I think over the last six or seven years I've gotten pretty good at publicizing my readings and events. It's hard, and there's a lot to stay on top of; you can't just mail stuff off and forget about it. I saw my Powell's reading listed in The Oregonian, via Google news alert, but had to be told that it got a very nice plug in The Portland Mercury. I think it's all valuable, but it does come at the expense of, and uses a different area of my brain's creative energies, writing at times. I've never been the hide away in an attic type of writer, and while I don't often physically write in public (though I did file a piece that's running tomorrow, on cupcakes - I think it's my first paid gig writing about cupcakes - from the Portland airport), I think getting your name out there, forcing yourself to overcome the nerves and do readings, is valuable and can be fun.



Speaking of book promotion, the fabulous Michelle Goodman, author of The Anti 9-to-5 Guide: Practical Career Advice for Women Who Think Outside the Cube (which I also recommend for those of you, like me, who work full-time, and to men), looks for affordable printers and quotes some of the stats I found. I wound up getting my She's on Top promo postcards, which I'm bringing/sending to bookstores and sex toy stores and mailing out to interested readers (want one? email me at rachelkramerbussel at gmail.com with "postcard" in the subject line and your name and mailing address in the body) from 1-800-POSTCARDS, because they were local and I thought I'd get them before SXSW. That didn't happen, but I am still really happy with their service. I also chose them because they did some of the layout work for me for only $25 extra, because I have ZERO brain for design. Next time, I'd go with 4 X 6 instead of 3.5 X 5.5, but still, I'm happy. And still have well over 4,000 postcards, which I'm sure I'll be using and handing out for a long time to come. (Thanks again to this Saturday's Spextravaganza organizer and Girl With Glasses author Marissa Walsh for the 1-800-POSTCARDS tip.)

A She's on Top excerpt: "By a Firm Hand" by Debra Hyde

Both books (He's on Top and She's on Top) are now IN STOCK from Amazon, finally. And if you were at the reading or have read one of the books and enjoyed them (which I truly hope you have), please feel free to leave a comment to that effect on Amazon. I also still have She's on Top postcards if anyone wants one - email me at rachelkramerbussel at gmail.com with "postcard" in the subject line and your name and mailing address in the body. The kinky virtual book tour starts on April 1st at Viviane's Sex Carnival! Stay tuned for excerpts, contests, and more naughty book fun.

From "By a Firm Hand" by Debra Hyde in She's on Top: Erotic Stories of Female Dominance and Male Submission.

The reward came in the form of clanging pots and pans. Robert was, finally, getting to the scrubbing part of his punishment.

Serves him right, she thought. That'll teach him.

It wasn't his masturbation that she was punishing. No, not at all. Judith understood the male drive and its neediness and how the convergence of such things would result in a man taking his dick in hand. She accepted how orgasm brings relief. What Judith could not tolerate was Robert's messiness and, even worse, his lack of respect for her possessions. That he left his dirty magazines lying about—on their marital bed, no less—irked her, but what really raised her ire was the pair of soiled panties she'd found there.

They were emerald green, soft and silky, and had cost her good money. She had found them amid the mess of his magazines, stiff with his jizz. He had taken these panties, a delicacy he had begged for, and then paraded about in them like a prancing mummer, and had coarsely used and discarded them. He had treated her expensive gift as if they were little more than a catcher's mitt, and he had done so with absolutely no regard or respect for her. He hadn't even had the common decency to tidy up after himself.

But that, Judith reminded herself, is why she ruled over him. Robert needed it, badly, too. Somehow, his need to be directed and controlled was deeply embedded, acquired perhaps at his mother's feet and over her knees in his little boyhood, then long sublimated only to blossom during adulthood as an erotic peculiarity—a peculiarity that made for her pleasure.

5 Questions About Blogging

Hanging in Peet's Coffee (cause Powell's was too crowded) on Hawthorne in Portland, readying myself to walk about 3 miles to Voodoo Doughnut and the other Powell's but first complete some overdue work that's been plaguing me. I'll wait out the rain and hopefully make a dent. Tonight after the reading I go stay with alpacas and tomorrow morning I help babysit three little boys, ages 2, 4, and 5. Got to catch up withs an old friend who just moved here which was fabulous and I definitely want to return to Portland when I have fewer bags and deadlines!

Crossing my fingers that my books have arrived at Powell's and that people show up tonight. At least two bloggers, Figleaf, who I think writes some of the smartest sex writing around, and Heidi of Adventures in Multiplicity, will be there. And I'll be bringing absolutely gorgeous (so pretty we declined to eat them last night cause they are so beautiful, a peril of the pretty cupcake) cupcakes from Cupcake Mama so please come out if you're in town: 7:30, tonight (Monday, March 26th) at Powell's Books, 3723 SE Hawthorne Blvd., to see and hear me, Shanna Germain, and Stan Kent read from She's on Top and He's on Top. (which are OUT NOW, despite whatever Amazon may tell you)

The fabulous Viviane interviewed me for her 5 Questions About Blogging series. That photo was taken by Paul Sarkis, but in real life I'm much more of a plain cotton bikini panty girl than a thong one.

He's on Top and She's on Top are here!

I have my copies of He's on Top and She's on Top, all shiny and gorgeous, so Amazon (click through the covers below to get to Amazon) should have them any moment. Pre-order now! Excerpts and blog tour starting April 1st. More news soon. I'm so thrilled with these books.

get your free Sex Smarts at my book release party April 12th

Want a free box of the sex trivia game Sex Smarts from Smartsco? Then come to my book party, where they'll be given away in the free goodie bags!

My hot new book coming in August: Crossdressing: a collection of erotic stories

My super-hot new book, coming in August, now available for pre-order:

Crossdressing: a collection of erotic stories

And Veronica Vera (who runs Miss Vera's Finishing School for Boys Who Want To Be Girls - click on her name for more details) is writing the foreword! It's almost done and I'm so thrilled with the variety. It's funny because there are some "straight" stories, as in, the sex is between a man and a woman, but even that I don't really consider totally "straight" when it comes to crossdressing. We've also got drag queens, butches in dresses, femmes packing, boys in panties, disguises, and so much more.

Here's the blurb currently on Amazon:

Sultry stories about slipping into something more comfortable, whether a tux or a teddy.
Explores the erotic thrill of crossing the gender divide and mixing things up in and out of the bedroom.
From femmes who channel Marlene Dietrich in the sexiest of suits to men who love nothing more than the feel silky panties stretched tight against their skin, these characters boldly indulge their fantasies of being a girl — or a guy — for a night. Drag queens get dolled up for a night on the town, a dyke packs a special surprise beneath her dress, and a devoted husband puts his dress-up skills to the ultimate test in this seductive new collection.

(Note to writers: I'm still finalizing the stories, so please be patient.)

NYC book release party for He's on Top and She's on Top April 12th

Portland He's on Top and She's on Top reading, Monday, March 16th, 7:30pm

In case you can't read it...

Join He's on Top: Erotic Stories of Male Dominance and Female Submission and She's on Top: Erotic Stories of Female Dominance and Male Submission editor Rachel Kramer Bussel along with contributors Shanna Germain and Stan Kent for a steamy reading from these hot-off-the-press kinky erotica collections.

Monday, March 26, 7:30 pm
Powell's Books, 3723 SE Hawthorne Blvd., Portland, Oregon
Free!
see powells.com or rachelkramerbussel.com for more info

MySpace hotness

She's on Top is in Powell's Books Top Friends!

Love it. I'm getting so psyched for that trip, corresponding with various writer pals in Oregon and realizing that there really is an East Coast/West Coast community of writers. I'm trying to stay calm and focus on other projects but part of me is just all excited to be getting mailingst ready for He's and She's.

And for the party on April 12th here in NY, I'm serving red velvet cupcakes, licorice whips, and red hots. And I want someone to whip me with licorice!

Want a free She's on Top postcard?

She's on Top: Erotic Stories of Female Dominance and Male Submission

I went with 1800postcards.com even though printrunner.com is cheaper because they're local and seemed like they'd do some of the work for me and I can pick them up and (fingers crossed) get them in time to bring to SXSW. But I will probably be making more In The Flesh flyers soon so may check out Print Runner, I'm just absolutely clueless when it comes to anything besides Microsoft Word so Quark, design, layout, etc. are all over my head. Hence, I'm having someone design flyers for me for Portland and the book launch.

Anway, if you want a free She's on Top postcard, email me at rachelkramerbussel@gmail.com with the "postcard" in the subject line and your name and mailing address in the body. Not that I expect a stampede, but I'll send 'em to the first 50 people who respond and will send them either next week or the week after. Books ship from the printer March 8th and I can't wait!

And if you're wondering, He's on Top and She's on Top are both fabulous, but I love the cover for She's so much I wanted to use that one for the 5,000 (!!) postcards I got made.

Cowboy and cowgirl hotness!

I just got word that my story "Reverse Cowgirl" will be published in Cowboy Lover: Erotic Stories of the Wild West edited by Cecilia Tan and Lori Perkins

Just goes to show that, as one of my story titles says, "never say never." That's probably the only vaguely cowboy/girl-ish story I have in me, at least right now. But in the last few years, I've really pushed myself to write about all kinds of topics I never thought I could properly tackle and it's really paid off, not just in pubilcation, but in showing me what I'm capable of.

Add She's on Top on MySpace

Crazy busy doing promo stuff for He's on Top and She's on Top, wrapping up some new anthologies, writing freelance pieces, etc. Looking forward to March in all its madness, trips, book releases and such but am trying to take everything day by day.

Hence, when all is chaos, I start a blog, or a MySpace page.

Please add my book, She's on Top: Erotic Stories of Female Dominance and Male Submission, on MySpace. In April, I'll be doing a virtual book tour for it, which I'll be announcing soon, and will probably have some giveaways, so stay tuned. Also sorting out the postcard issue, hopefully I'll have them to bring to Austin - I found another site, Printrunner.com, where I can get 5,000 postcards for around $170! (thanks to Maria of Daily Dose of Queer) Once I get them made, I'll be sending them to those who want them.

Postcard help?

Because this book cover is too hot not to plaster all over town and in my travels, I want to get postcards made that have this image on one side and a bit of info (ISBN number, brief description) of She's on Top and He's on Top on the other that I can send out to promote the book party and pass out to people. Any suggestions on the best/easiest places to get such postcards made, keeping in mind that I'm so technically and design ignorant I get flummoxed easily with this stuff? I probably want to get about 1,000 postcards made, regular postcard size. Hell, I'll even pay someone (sorry, only $50) if you can hook me up with a good/cheap company and do the layout for me - email me at rachelkramerbussel at gmail.com - thank you!

Portland!

I'm so freaking excited that I'm going to be reading at the coolest independent bookstore ever, Powell's (and check out their awesome book blog while you're there). I remember going there on a trip during college; my friends and I spread out and spent an hour wandering the stacks, each returning with huge piles of books. I found one of Joan Hess's mysteries written under the name Joan Hadley. They also do free shipping on orders over $50 and have lots of used books.

But Portlanders, you should come out on March 26th at 7:30 to the Hawthorne store for my He's on Top/She's on Top reading with two of my favorite erotica writers, local author Shanna Germain and the always wonderful Stan Kent, who's flying up from LA. I'll be bringing cupcakes from either Cupcake Mama or Saint Cupcake--or both!

Also, I know about Portland Metroblogging, Portland Mercury, Portland Tribune, and Willamette Week, but if there are other Portland blogs/media outlets I should know about to promote the reading, please let me know at rachelkramerbussel at gmail.com

I'm also on the lookout for:

Cool stuff going on in Portland from Sunday, March 25th to Tuesday, March 27th

Travel info between Portland and Eugene

So readers not in Oregon, please let your Portland pals know about the reading. Books are shipping from the printer March 8th, not a moment too soon. I really can't wait to see these shiny covers in 3D!

Also: NYC book party for He's on Top and She's on Top will be Thursday, April 12th from 7 pm - 9 pm at Happy Ending!

Single State of the Union table of contents

Since my contributors' copies are supposedly on their way to me and I haven't even seen the book in stores but am getting curious, I looked up Single State of the Union and found the table of contents - I'm right after Chelsea Handler!

The only other thing I have to say is that when I grow up, I want a family and life like this. I think I'd even give up the sex writing to have that. Okay, maybe not entirely, but somewhat. So cute! Especially the names "Hamish" and "Stella." The Millers are all adorable, parents and kids.

Single State of the Union edited by Diane Mapes

Introduction: Greetings from Spinster Island

How Come a Nice Girl Like You Isn't Married?

Susan Shapiro Single-Minded
Sasha Cagen How to Not Get the Guy, or I Dodged a Reality Show Bullet
Amy Thomas An Open Letter to Mom, Deana, Mary and the Folks at Work
Margaret Cho I Am Getting Married
Jane Hodges You Can't Go Home Again

Marriage Can Wait

Judy McGuire Cohabitation Hesitation
Susan Jane Gilman Marriage Ain't Prozac
E. Kay Trimberger Can a Single Woman Really Be Happy Without a Soulmate?
M. Susan Wilson Solitary Refinement

The Single Girl

Jane Ganahl Faux Boyfriends
Jessica Valenti The Taming of the Shrew
Amy Hudock What Daughters Do
April Sinclair The Straight and Nappy
Adele Slaughter The Return on My Investment Has Quadrupled
Litsa Dremousis The Great Cookie Offering
Suzanne Cope Gold Shoes

Sex and the Single Girl

Dana Rozier Victoria's True Secret
Suzanne Schlosberg The Streak
Wendy Merrill The Wisdom of Menopause
Chelsea Handler THUNDER
Rachel Kramer Bussel A Work in Progress: Inside the Mind (and Bed) of a Single Sex Columnist
Michal Reed Next is Now
Sarah Iverson Sex Ed

Unwed Mother

Rachel Toor Me and I
Margaret Smith Doctor, Donor, Desperado
Mikki Morrissette Choosing Single Parenthood and a Two-Roof Marriage
Rachel Sarah Single Scapegoat Seeking ...

I Married Adventure

Amanda Castleman Tangled up in the Wild Blue
Heather McKinnon Postcard from the Edge
Jillian Robinson Out of Africa, in Karen Blixen's Footsteps
Lynn Harris Me Make Fire for Lynn

Live Alone and Like It

Laurie Notaro The Speech
Rachel Eve Radway Home Alone
Bella DePaulo Single All the Way
Abigail Grotke Single Blessedness
Michelle Goodman House Without a Spouse
Genevieve Davis Ginsburg Life After Death

Appropriately enough: Single State of the Union is out

The fabulous Diane Mapes has edited a brand-new anthology called Single State of the Union that I'm honored to have an essay in. Apparently, it's just hit bookstores. My essay is called (and yes, now utterly out of date, so consider it a snapshot of a certain moment in time last year) "A Work in Progress: Inside the Mind (and Bed) of a Single Sex Columnist."

Here's a little peek:

Car sex, foot fetishists, lap dances, public spankings, double fisting, bondage─you name it, I’ve heard about it.

Most of the time, I lap it right up, but sometimes I just want to clear my head of all things sex, so as not to remind myself of what my life is lacking. Granted, I have had my share of sexual adventures─a tryst with Betty Dodson’s boyfriend in a sleazy motel, sex with a porn director, a date where all I did was get spanked and masturbate in front of my spanker. I’ve written about my love of blowjobs, breasts, threesomes, and kinky sex. I’ve even posed for nude photos and had people tell me they’ve jerked off to them.

Yet that’s only a small part of my life. Mostly, I go to work, I go to comedy shows, I hang out with my friends, read and rent movies, go to the gym, and wander around New York City. I geek out over board games, babies, and cupcakes. I’m in daily touch with my parents and weekly touch with my grandparents. And like many other women, I stress out about being late, my student loans, and my weight...

The discrepancy between what people think I’m doing, what I am doing, and what I want to be doing is sometimes so vast I have no idea how to bridge the gaps.

Here's an Amazon link and the description from there. Other authors include Judy McGuire, Lynn Harris, Rachel Sarah, Sasha Cagen, Jane Ganahl, Jessica Valenti, Suzanne Schlosberg, Sarah Iverson, Lits Dremousis, Michelle Goodman, Margaret Cho, Chelsea Handler, Susan Jane Goodman, Laurie Notaro, and on and on. I'm excited because I am trying to move in the direction of non-fiction, or add that to the fiction mix as much as possible. I put off and put off and put off my essay and Diane was super patient, so I'm really grateful for that. Diane's latest freelance pieces are: "Does your skin need a shrink?" at MSNBC and her Seattle Post-Intelligencer column on guys who disappear. Major thanks to Dategirl Judy McGuire (who just finished her own book about dating, woo-hoo!) for connecting me with Diane.



Are single women happy individualists? Neurotic man-hunters? Crazed cat ladies? Are they confused, or content? Bitter, or better off?

No one seems to know. The popular media gives us shoe shopaholics, ditzy desperados, wannabe brides forever making cow eyes at The Bachelor. But what do single women have to say about their own lives?

With sass, humor, and style, Single State of the Union paints a provocative, playful, and complex portrait of today's single woman, taking on such topics as:

o sex and the single girl
o single motherhood
o buying a house without a spouse
o faux boyfriends
o cohabitation hesitation
o single women in the media

Written by an impressive roster of single (and some formerly single) women, this collection portrays single women as individuals whose lives extend well beyond Match.com and Manolo Blahniks.

So listen up, Carrie. Attention, Bridget. It's time for the rest of us to be heard.

Bloggers - want a free book and part of a promo tour?

Hey bloggers - especially the sex/kinky ones - want a free book? I'm doing a special online promotion during the month of March for my new anthologies He's on Top: Erotic Stories of Male Dominance and Female Submission and She's on Top: Erotic Stories of Female Dominance and Male Submission and need your help. So if you're a blogger and want to possibly take part in this promotion (for which you'd get a free book in exchange for a post about one of these books and being part of a virtual book tour) and would involve very little of your time, please email me at rachelkramerbussel at gmail.com with "Kinky Book Tour" in the subject line and I'll send you the details. Preference given to blogs with high traffic, ones that participate in things like Sugasm, etc. - the goal is to get the most eyes viewing this as possible. I've only go a few spots left so first come, first serve - thank you!