Email: rachelkramerbussel at


Lusty Lady

Watch my first and favorite book trailer for Spanked: Red-Cheeked Erotica. Get Spanked in print and ebook

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

I lost my Black Lace virginity - twice


I have two stories in the new Black Lace (RIP, this year is the last year they are publishing anything new) anthology Sexy Little Numbers. I even got my name on the cover, woo-hoo! As someone who owns a lot of Black Lace books and has been reading them since way back in the early 2000s when I was first writing erotica, this is an extreme honor.

The first excerpt is from the start of the story, the "All in the Details" one, about a bisexual couple's dirty talk is a little bit into the story. I'm honored that the esteemed Adam Nevill (now at XCite Books) bought these stories and that I'm in a Black Lace anthology. Seriously, pinch me! I think I blogged this before, but yes, "The Perfect Distraction" is fiction, but was inspired by a hot couple I'd have hooked up with if we'd had time who I met at Dark Odyssey. Also, any time I can work in photo hunt, aka "the naked girl game," I'm a happy writer.

The Perfect Distraction
by Rachel Kramer Bussel

It’s hard to get distracted from watching an orgasm relay race, but Charles and Amanda manage to distract me quite easily. We’re all standing watching five women get fucked by powerful, giant machines that are intent on bringing them to orgasm. The room is filled with the collective energy of held breaths, wet pussies, and hard cocks as we partake in the highlight of the BDSM conference. Except for, well, me. I’ve come here on my own, and the two of them are the hottest thing I’ve seen all weekend, outstripping even the motor-powered climaxes just waiting to happen. Real live flesh will win out over machinery anytime, though in this case it’s pretty close.

Still, it’s undeniable that they are creating their own quite powerful energy right in front of me, the kind that you feel more than see, the kind that makes your pussy tingle and your brain go to mush. He’s got a sexy short brown beard and pinchable cheeks, and she’s got red hair, glasses, and a cleavage-baring red dress, but it’s not just their looks; it’s the energy they give off that makes me want to escape from the crowd and get them alone. They’re whispering and giggling and she’s running her hand under his shirt; I imagine she’s running a fingertip over his nipple. I can’t make out their words, but I don’t need to; I can tell they’re plenty dirty.

We keep turning toward each other, the attraction palpable, like we’ve already dispensed with the getting-to-know-you small talk and moved on to getting-to-fuck-you. He’s rubbing the back of her neck, and I picture him grabbing her there and shoving her onto her knees. I step closer to them and get in on their whispering. “Charles wants you to spank him,” Amanda says to me, then looks away. She’s made me blush, and I tell her so. I may put on a good front, but I’m never quite sure what to do when people so boldly proposition me. Clearly they’ve heard about the impromptu spanking demo I gave the day before, one that was fun, but nothing to write home about. It was a momentary bit of pleasure, but it didn’t make me ache like watching the two of them does.

All in the Details
by Rachel Kramer Bussel

I had already slipped my fingers between my legs. This was the best foreplay we’d engaged in in years. I was so smitten with the idea of my very manly, hunky boyfriend jerking off in secret as he lusted after his male roommate. It was so forbidden and naughty and hot. I’ve long loved looking at men kissing, whether photos, porn, or real-life opportunities, and have even initiated male-on-male action from some of my friends who’ve seemed interested but tentative, though those forays had never yielded more than a few moments of mutual pleasure. And while watching bonafide gay guys make out is arousing, getting two men who wouldn’t otherwise be drawn to their own sex to discover the thrill of kissing another man, making another man hard, is the sexiest power trip I know. My friend Belinda taught me how to go about it, and it’s been a little party trick of ours over the years, but one whose excitement was fleeting and impossible to predict; some guys can, indeed, resist a pretty girl pouting and begging him to pucker up.

So knowing that my lover, the man I’d shared a bed with for the past two years, had just such an episode in his past, was making my wetness practically spill onto my fingers. “I was going to just try to make my cock calm down, but I wound up beating off as I thought about him down on his knees sucking me off. I had to shut my eyes and soon I was coming, biting my lip to stifle my moans as I quickly cleaned up and headed back out, trying to keep my dirty thoughts to myself, even though I knew there was no going back. Once I’d pictured him swallowing my seed, I knew we’d be naked together by the end of the night.” He paused to kiss the back of my neck, almost absently, like he wished it were Jason’s. Then he came to life, nuzzling against me, breathing in the scent of my grapefruit shampoo, so he got to be there and here at once. We both did, and I was getting such a vivid picture in my mind, I was starting to regret that we hadn’t met back then and could’ve devised a way for me to watch this gay seduction in action.

“I took him to a bar off campus that most students shunned because it had nothing fancy to offer. But as you know, I have a soft spot for dive bars, and the darkness there was the perfect cover for me to both cheer Jason up and make him think our getting together was his idea. I bought us both beers, whatever was on tap, and then made him chug his. Then I got us another round and suggested we play photo hunt--you know, that game you love, actually, with the almost-naked girls you have to match up with each other.” I giggled, because it’s true; just like his former friend, I get beyond excited when I see that a bar has those video games. They bring out my competitive spirit along with my desire to check out other women.

“I figured that if we were both safely looking at women, women in glistening bikinis, picturing what we’d do with these girls, we’d both get turned on, but the chances of any real-life women entering our realm were slim. The chances of them coming on to us were even slimmer, so the result would be that we’d head back to our room a little buzzed and a lot horny. And that’s pretty much what happened.” His fingers found mine inside my panties as he pressed his hard-on against my backside. I was glad this wasn’t just some chore he was doing as a favor, recounting the time he got it on with another guy. I’d done the same for him, told him about fiery kisses with other girls, my friend who attacked me one night and wouldn’t stop until I sucked her nipples to orgasm, or my ex-girlfriend who delighted in lifting up my skirt and giving me spankings anywhere and everywhere. I loved sharing those details because I’d been with too many guys who were close-minded and felt threatened by even a hint of lesbian lust. Here I’d found a hot guy who not only wanted to hear about my dykey past, but had a little contribution of his own to our bisexual relationship.

In other words, I knew that at the end he’d fuck me senseless. “Keep going,” I murmured, meaning both his fingers and his tale.

“So we played a few more rounds, wound up getting free vodka shots from the bartender, and capped things off with a final beer. Jason was grinning, and when I asked if he was feeling better, he looked at me like I was speaking in tongues. ‘What do you mean? I’ve never felt better,’ he said, with a little slur in his voice. ‘Let’s get out of here,’ he said and winked.”

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Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Quickies: Short Erotica, Friday, October 2, 7:30-8:30 with FREE CUPCAKES!

Unless some major free time opens up in my schedule (ha ha ha ha ha!) this will be the last Quickies. FREE Baked by Melissa cupcakes and HOT readers!

FREE for you on Friday!

Me hosting the last In The Flesh; photo by Anya Garrett

October 2, 7:30-8:30
The final Quickies, in which readers have 6 minutes to wow the audience. Featuring Mark Becker, John Bredin, Lise Horton, Jamie Peck, Deb Victoroff, and Diana Vilibert. Hosted by Rachel Kramer Bussel (Bottoms Up, Spanked, The Mile High Club). Free cupcakes from Baked by Melissa.
(B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey or F/V to 2nd Avenue,
Between Forsyth & Eldridge. Look for the hot pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club."
Admission: Free, 21+ only
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676

Mark Becker was born in Montreal and raised in New York and California. His first success as a writer came as a freshman at the University of Denver when he won an essay contest and had his work published in the school's freshman English textbook. He now writes and acts for the sketch comedy troupe Camp Wayne, which performs every month at the Broadway Comedy Club in Manhattan. Mark enjoys playing tennis, riding his bicycle, and people watching in this wonderful city.

John Bredin is a teacher, writer, and activist who is currently a Professor of English at CUNY's Inwood/ Washington Heights campus. His book SLURP: Sex Life Under Reconstruction Project--currently being serialized by Oysters & Chocolate--is equal parts humorous and scholarly. It also proposes a radical new erotic theory to expand safe sexual pleasure in the world. John's essays and stories have appeared in The Filipino Express, The Hudson Current, Slow Trains, Clean Sheets, and The Brooklyn Rail.

Rachel Kramer Bussel is an author, editor, blogger and reading series host. She is Senior Editor at Penthouse Variations and a former sex columnist for The Village Voice. She’s edited numerous anthologies, two of which (Up All Night and Glamour Girls) have been Lambda Literary Award finalists, most recently The Mile High Club: Plane Sex Stories, Do Not Disturb: Hotel Sex Stories, Best Sex Writing 2009, Tasting Him, Tasting Her, and Spanked. Her writing been published in publications such as Clean Sheets, Cosmopolitan, The Daily Beast, Fresh Yarn, Huffington Post, Mediabistro, Newsday, New York Post, San Francisco Chronicle, Tango, The Village Voice, and Time Out New York, and in over 100 anthologies, including Best American Erotica 2004 and 2006. She has hosted In The Flesh since October 2005.

In her prior creative incarnation, Lise Horton was a former actress and award-winning cabaret performer. Having turned those appetites in another, more literary direction, she is now eagerly pursuing publication, writing deliciously steamy erotic romance in numerous genres. She is a Vice President of the NYC Chapter of RWA, and a member of Sisters In Crime NYC.

Jamie Peck is a freelance writer currently living and working in Brooklyn. She attended Columbia University, where she studied English, art history, and creative writing, wrote for the humor paper and the regular paper, and helped start Columbia's first student produced sexuality 'zine, Outlet. She has written for publications including Suicidegirls, The L Magazine, Impose Magazine, Citysearch, The New York Press, and Vice. She also enjoys bike riding, 80's prom dresses, awkward dancing, tinkering with recipes, drinking wine on her roof, and throwing house parties.

Deb Victoroff is a playwright with several well-received short plays under her belt. Her plays have been performed in Manhattan (at The Producer's Club, the Samuel French competition, and the Strawberry One Act Festival), in Brooklyn (at the Black Box Festival), at the Source Festival in Washington DC, and the First Stage in Los Angeles. Her play "Letter From a Soldier" was well received in Vancouver (a
review is here) where it was performed at the Walking Fish Festival and later at the Fringe Festival. The play also came in second (out of more than 200 submissions) in the New Works of Merit Competition out of Manhattan.

Diana Vilibert ( is the web editor at Marie Claire, where she gets on her soapbox regularly to write about sex and dating for Her work has also appeared in CosmoGIRL!,,, and various other dot-coms. You can follow her quarter-life crisis at

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Praise from Violet Blue for "Secret Service"

Publisher Cleis Press allowed search inside on Amazon for Violet Blue's upcoming anthology (pub date November 1!) Best Women's Erotica 2010, and here's what she said about my story in her introduction "The Chocolate Taster," which I love:

Then there are stories that catch you just slightly off guard but make you wish they’d come true, ASAP. Rachel Kramer Bussel’s fantastic “Secret Service” is where “Kitchen Confidential” meets Best Women’s Erotica: here, culinary arts meet oral sex in service to ladies who lunch, and then quite a bit more, when the owner of a very special New York restaurant tries a random taste (in a manner of speaking) of what’s on the menu.

Oh, and I'm reading part of my story January 21st at Sex and Food Night at In The Flesh.

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Sunday, September 27, 2009

Seattle Lusty Lady greetings

My friend Brian Van sent me this from his travels, taken in Seattle:

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Interesting call for submissions: And Then It Shifted

I have nothing to do with this, just stumbled across this call and found it fascinating.

Official site

Working Title:

And Then It Shifted: Women Open Up About Leaving Men for Women (Seal Press, 2010)

Call for Submissions

2,000-4,000 words

Payment: Upon publication (Amount will vary, depending on experience and other variables ($50 and up). Please include a list of any previous publication credits with your query or submission.) Writers included in the anthology will also receive two contributor copies of the book.

Deadline: December 1, 2009 (Early queries and submissions are encouraged.)

Editors: Candace Walsh and Laura André

As Dr. Lisa Diamond’s recent groundbreaking book Sexual Fluidity makes clear, women’s sexual desire and identity are capable of shifting. Cynthia Nixon, Carol Leifer, Wanda Sykes, Portia de Rossi, and countless, less well-known others have left the fold of heterosexual identity to enter into or pursue same-sex relationships.

Although this book will evolve as we receive submissions, we welcome first-person essays from women

1. who were aware that they had always felt robust same-sex desires, but wanted to try to make it work in the straight world, and also
2. who identified as heterosexual at one time, but found that the situation they were in just naturally led to embarking on an intimate romantic relationship with a woman.

We seek a diversity of voices, and welcome submissions from a variety of perspectives. We also welcome essays from women who don’t fit precisely into the above descriptions, of course.

Here are some questions that we’d like answered in your piece. It may be one of the questions, or you may touch on most of them, and throw in some extra, great stuff that didn’t even occur to us. Please don’t feel like this is an essay question test and that you have to cover them all—we want the format of your essay to feel organic and not be explicitly dictated by our questions.

How did you come to your moment of truth?

Did your perception of yourself change?

Do you feel that others’ perceptions of you changed? Did they surprise you with either an unexpected positive or negative reaction? How did this affect you? Did their reactions change over time?

Do you feel like you surrendered heterosexuality or elements of heterosexual privilege? Do you feel like your new life with a woman has yielded rewards? What were the rewards you expected and which ones were surprises?

What do you miss? What do you not miss? Everything from in the bedroom to out at dinner, at a wedding, as a parent, as a family member, at the gym, in the workplace, on a picnic—whatever comes up for you.

What is this journey like, in general and for you? How did you feel as you were setting out on it and how do you feel now? How do you mark your progress? Were there stages? Illustrative moments? Looking back, do you feel like you went through certain phases?

What is it like to shift your identity? What about you is the same and always will be? What about you has changed or altered?

How did you feel as you began your relationship with a woman? Did you get flak from individuals who second-guessed you? Did you feel like you had to prove yourself? How did you keep your internal balance?

How did your socialization as a straight woman prepare you (ill or well) for pursuing a woman or being in a relationship with a woman?

How did your cultural/religious/racial/ethnic background shape your experience?

Do you like, or are you attracted to certain things that your partner or girlfriend, or gay women do that are traditionally labeled as
masculine? Feminine?

How do you define yourself? Do you feel like the current “labels” work for you or that what you are is not yet defined by a word or phrase? What paradigm do you imagine?

Are you still with the woman you left your previous relationship for? Was she just a catalyst, or a rebound, or something else, or “the one”?

As editors, we value specificity, detail, “showing, not telling,” honesty, epiphanies, clean, polished, yet real and un-prettied-up writing, and the sharing of insights.

Please send your submission (Word document, double-spaced), along with a short bio and full contact information to:

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Friday, September 25, 2009

Sex and Comedy Night October 15th at In The Flesh Reading Series

And the final Quickies takes place Friday, October 2, 7:30-8:30. Free cupcakes, lots of great readers and the great relief for me of not trying to organize another one! They've been fun but no time and it's better to focus on building up In The Flesh. In November I have so many awesome giveaways of sex toys, a $100 Babeland gift card, 2010 Sex Blogger Calendars, and more. But first I have to make it through November - 6 events in October plus plugging sex and comedy night. WOW.

Yes, we are having our first guest host while I'm in San Francisco for Litquake. I promise you LOTS and LOTS of laughter! Please come out and show Carolyn and everyone else how funny sex can be!

And yes, OF COURSE, there will be free cupcakes!

In the ultra swanky, sexy former massage parlor that is Happy Ending Lounge:

October 15th at 8 PM (doors at 7; we recommend arriving by 7:30 for a seat)
(B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey or F/V to 2nd Avenue,
Between Forsyth & Eldridge. Look for the hot pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club."
Admission: Free
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676

Sex and Comedy Night is back with guest host Carolyn Castiglia (Last Comic Standing, Funniest Mom in America) filling in for Rachel Kramer Bussel. Featuring comedians Seth Herzog (Sweet), Dan Hirshon (Lampshades and Ottomans), Shayna Ferm, Shawn Hollenbach (Miss Fag Hag Pageant), Margot Leitman (Stripped Stories) and Mindy Raf (Best Night Ever), as well as writers Marty Beckerman (Dumbocracy) and Megan Carpentier. Free cupcakes from Baked by Melissa will be served.

In the Flesh is a monthly reading series hosted at the appropriately named Happy Ending Lounge, and features the country's best erotic writers sharing stories to get you hot and bothered, hosted and curated by acclaimed erotic writer and editor Rachel Kramer Bussel. From erotic poetry to down and dirty smut, these authors get naked on the page and will make you lust after them and their words. Since its debut in October 2005, In the Flesh has featured such authors as Laura Antoniou, Mo Beasley, Susie Bright, Lily Burana, Jessica Cutler, Mike Daisey, Stephen Elliott, Valerie Frankel, Polly Frost, Gael Greene, Andy Horwitz, Debra Hyde, Maxim Jakubowski, Emily Scarlet Kramer of CAKE, Josh Kilmer-Purcell, Edith Layton, Logan Levkoff, Suzanne Portnoy, Sofia Quintero, M.J. Rose, Lauren Sanders, Danyel Smith, Grant Stoddard, Cecilia Tan, Carol Taylor, Dana Vachon, Veronica Vera, Susan Wright, Zane and many others. The series has gotten press attention from the New York Times’s UrbanEye, Escape (Hong Kong), Flavorpill, The L Magazine, New York Magazine, New York Observer, Philadelphia City Paper, Time Out New York, Flavorwire, Gothamist,, and Wonkette, and has been praised by Dr. Ruth.

Marty Beckerman, 26, is the author of Dumbocracy, Generation S.L.U.T. and Death to All Cheerleaders. He has written for Playboy, Discover, Huffington Post, New York Press, mediabistro and The Daily Beast, and has been featured by the New York Times, Gawker, MSNBC,, and National Public Radio. Christian Lander, bestselling author of Stuff White People Like, said of Dumbocracy: "Beckerman uses the deft and subtle touch of a sledgehammer. If you can read this entire book without being offended, then there is a good chance that you are illiterate. If you can read this entire book and not enjoy it, then there's a good chance you take yourself too seriously."

Megan Carpentier is a freelance writer and a former editor of whose work has also been published in The Daily Beast, Glamour and Ms.

Carolyn Castiglia has been seen and heard nationally on VH1, MTV2, NBC's Last Comic Standing, Nick-at-Nite's Funniest Mom in America, The Maury Show, ABC World News with Charles Gibson and Sirius/XM Radio. She performs stand-up all over New York, in both alternative venues and mainstream clubs. Internationally she's appeared at the Comedy Cafe in Amsterdam and most recently at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, where she filmed a pilot for BBC3 with Brown Eyed Boy called Laughter Shock, showcasing the 14 edgiest International stand-ups at the Fringe. Her solo show, Brown Ambition, has been performed at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, Off-Broadway at 59E59 Theatres and premiered at Ars Nova. Her joke writing has appeared in Time Out New York, the New York Post and The Idiot's Guide to Jokes.

photo by Anya Garrett

Shayna Ferm performs solo, with her band and also with her sketch comedy group, Fearsome, at music and comedy venues all over NYC. Her band, "Shayna Ferm and the Upper Deckers" released their first album, Blonde, last year. She is currently working on a video project for one of her latest hits.

Seth Herzog has been a professional actor since elementary school and performing stand up since the 5th grade talent show. After doing a lot of theater as a youth (and 5 summers at Stagedoor Manor), he found stand up again once he moved back to NY in 1994, and since than has a been a vital force in the thriving downtown scene. He's the creator and producer of Sweet, a long running, popular show at the Slipper Room. Sweet has hosted some of the greatest talents in the country, along with his Mom. On the big screen, Seth has appeared the films, Role Models, The Ten, The Baxter, Safe Men, In the Weeds and upcoming The Winning Season. On the small screen, Seth has been a regular pop culture pundit on VH1's Best Week Ever and All Access series for the last 5 years. Also, he's had some memorable turns on Comedy Central's "The Chappelle Show" & "Stella" as well as, CBS's Love Monkey, E! #1 Single, and AMC's Date Night.

Though incapable of doing his own laundry, Dan Hirshon is able to leave audiences in hysterics. Since taking the spotlight in Boston's Theater District several years ago Dan has performed at the Boston and Las Vegas Comedy Festivals, co-written and produced the sketch comedy album, Lampshades and Ottomans, and shared secrets about his traumatic childhood with strangers from Maine to South Africa. If you are looking to laugh or just looking for a 90-pound basket case with a Jewfro who dresses like a seventh grader, then you'll love Dan.

Shawn Hollenbach is a New York based stand-up comedian, improv actor and songwriter. You may have seen him on Logo's Gayest Week Ever or hear him occasionally on The Frank DeCaro Show on Sirus/XM's OutQ Radio. He has been featured on two episodes of Hot Gay Comics Live on here! TV and was the host of a celebrity video podcast, Busted. Shawn is the producer of Closet Cases, a Critics' Pick for Time Out NY and a Homo Must for HX Magazine. He was the creator and co-producer of the Miss Fag Hag Pageant featuring Caroline Rhea, Hedda Lettuce and Michael Musto. He also co-produces The Back Room at Comix Ochi's Lounge and The Skip and Sparkle Variety Show as Skip Lickdale with Katina Corrao. Shawn has also been on the Comedy Central at Crash Mansion Showcase and has performed with the Funny Gay Males 20th Anniversary Show at Gotham Comedy Club.

Margot Leitman’s off beat, brutally honest, fearless comedy has earned her two ECNY “Best Female Stand Up” nominations and the “Joke of the Week” in Time Out New York. Margot now regularly appears as various characters, including the cult favorite Gynoblast on Late Night With Conan O’ Brien, in addition to appearances on VH1’s Best Week Ever, ESPN’s Cheap Seats, AMC, the Style Network, E!, Comedy Central, MTV and NBC Broadband. Most recently she can be heard as the voice of “Fox” on the new Spike TV cartoon The Team, as a featured comedian on Comedy’s Weekly Evil, and dancing in the current Mohegan Sun ad campaign. Every month she and Giulia Rozzi co-host the wildly popular, monthly, sex-themed storytelling show Stripped Stories. Margot has been featured in Glamour magazine, and the books Fifty Dates Worse Than Yours and The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Jokes. She has written online for the Lifetime Network, College, and in print for Playgirl magazine.

Mindy Raf has appeared regularly on VH1's Best Night Ever, and has contributed her comedy and voiceover work for WACB, The Daily Comedy Network, and Mindy also authored a widely-read relationship column on College that has been featured in The New Yorker and the New York Post. Mindy performs stand-up and musical comedy as well as sketch characters all over New York, in both alternative venues and mainstream clubs. Her most popular character being chick rocker/vegan activist Leibya (Labia) Rogers, who she played recently in her solo show Leibya Fair! Mindy is currently working on her first novel which is set to be published by Dial Books for Young Readers, a division of Penguin.

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"Cocktease" erotica for charity

I have a story called "Cocktease" in this charity erotica anthology Ultimate Decadence. No clue what the distribution in the US is like; their last one, Ultimate Burlesque, which I don't have a story in, doesn't seem to be available from Amazon. But anyway, back to's the TOC and this is the official site. Big thanks to co-editor Emily Dubberley along with Aly Fixter for asking me to contribute. A minimum of 15% of the cover price goes to Macmillan Cancer Support. In the U.S., Amazon is listing a September 29th pub date. Will let you know more when I get my copies/hear anything.

Contents include:

Ultimate Decadence

Poppy Winters

Beautiful Things

Kitty Meadows

Blind Man’s Buff

Justine Elyot

A Costume Drama

Daphne Bing

Endless Night

Marcelle Perks


Emily Dubberley

Blow the Candles, Baby

Suzanne Portnoy& Simon Morgan

New Blood

Wersha Bharadwa


Miranda Forbes

The Decline of Conversation


The Gilded Fountain

Jeremy Edwards

The Night at the Hotel

Elizabeth K. Payne

Swing Town

Lauren Wissot


Donna George Storey

Tube Journey

Paris Orsini

Wedding Day

Jennifer Dark

Dark Horse

Karen Krizanovich

Pink Champagne

Laura Godman

Double Take

Madeline Moore

Sculpted to Perfection

Elizabeth Coldwell

Coming Home

Josephine Jay

A Night at the Opera

Sarah Berry

Alice’s Indulgence

Adam Sawyer

Sweet Like Chocolate

Mark Farley


Mistress Grace


Rachel Kramer Bussel

Indulgence Calling…

Angel O’Neill


Sarah-Louise Young

Take Me to Carnevale

Maxim Jakubowski

All or Nothing

Henrietta Maddox

I so haven't edited this and saw a bunch of typos (bad me! bad me!) so hopefully those got fixed, been a little nutso on the writing end but here's an excerpt:

by Rachel Kramer Bussel

“No, I’m not gonna do it,” Brad said, sounding more like a petulant child than the self-made chef he was.

“Not for everyone in the world, just for me. Right here. That’s what I want: to see you touch yourself. I want to watch, baby. You know I love looking at your cock, right?” I was starting to whine, but I couldn’t help it. Seeing him do his own private circle jerk had become the reigning fantasy, playing on rotation in my mind nonstop.

I was poised in front of him, on my knees, in easy sucking distance, like I’d been plenty of times in the last six months. Truth is, I wanted to suck him, too, but even more than that, I wanted to update the homepage in my mind, to see what he looked like when he wasn’t with me, but was getting off.

But for the life of me, I couldn’t get Brad to comply. He even started, his hand moving up and down, playing hide and seek with his gorgeous cock but then burst out laughing and looked away. “Baby, I wish I could do it for you, but I just can’t. I feel awkward with you watching.”

I couldn’t understand it; I’d seen his dick hundreds of times. So I decided to take matters into my own hands--and out of his. “Fine, then, if you can’t do me this one itsy little favor…I have another idea.” I fished out a pair of black and gold fishnets of mine that I know he loves, bending over to reach them so my ass would be right in his reach. He started to fondle my bottom, but just as he got into it, I shifted around so I was behind him, and started to tie his hands behind his back, with my stockings.

“What are you doing, Brenda?”

“Oh, nothing. I’m just going to show you how excruciating it can be to not get what you want. Kindof like you did to me.”

Read the rest in Ultimate Decadence.

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Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Bicoastal events October 15th

No, I will not magically appear in two places.

I will be in San Francisco:

And Sex and Comedy Night will happen at In The Flesh with guest host Carolyn Castiglia!

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Monday, September 21, 2009

If you tried to email me yesterday, please resend

My rachelkb account was down for about 24 hours so if you send me something between 10 am Sunday and this morning, please resend. Cooking up lots of stuff just...taking a long time to get there.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Shana Tova!

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Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Second favorite

I had the honor of being driven around by Sheela Namakkal, famed Minneapolis cupcake maker of Miel y Leche. She and her friend Emily (in the orange shirt on the right) are starting a bakery called Cake Eater and I am hoping to fly out for the opening, in part because I feel it's a challenge I want to be able to meet to do Minneapolis in winter. Anyway, she rented this crazy muscle car and it was so fun to be driven around in it. This photo, on our way to Bleeding Heart Bakery (see organic sign in background), is another I adore. I hope we can make this cupcake summit thing an annual event.

Chicago cupcake souvenir

I love this photo and gift from Swirlz Cupcakes. See the rest of my Chicago cupcake summit photos on Flickr.

Can I interest you in my newsletter?

If you don't already subscribe, it's very easy to do so, and it only goes out once a month (once in a while there's an extra one thrown in there). I try my best to get it out before each month's In The Flesh (aka, right before sometimes, but before).

Just go to my site and sign up on the left-hand side. It used to be super ugly because I have no idea how to handle YMLP but my lovely assistant Inara now makes it all pretty with photos and everything.


Reading tonight at Restless Legs Reading Series

Still recovering from my cold/flu post-Chicago but am rallying for this sexy reading tonight at David Farley's Restless Legs Reading Series

A reading series for the wanderlust stricken, the Restless Legs gatherings bring travelers, travel writers, and the people who love them together for an evening of sharing tales from the road, gossiping, and general debauchery. Tony Perrottet, Ayun Halliday, Mary Morris, Cullen Thomas, Richard Goodman, Matt Gross, Tom Coyne, Elisabeth Eaves, Alice Bradley, Benjamin Wallace, David Grann, and contributors to the award-winning site,, have all read.

Broome and Allen Sts. on the Lower East Side of New York City.

Next Reading:

On Wednesday September 16 at 7pm (in the downstairs room of Lolita Bar) please join us for another great reading.

Rachel Kramer Bussel likes two things: cupcakes and sex. Well, she likes writing about sex and eating cupcakes. She's edited over 20 anthologies including The Best Sex Writing 2008, Spanked: Red Cheeked Erotica, and The Mile High Club: Plane Sex Stories. Her writing has also appeared in The San Francisco Chronicle, New York Press, and the Village Voice.

Paul Bravmann probably likes cupcakes and sex too, but he rarely writes about it. A fiction writer and a journalist, Paul has written for The Stranger, Details, The Nation, and the New York Times Book Review.

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Everything you ever wanted to know about the Best Sex Writing series published by Cleis Press and (now) edited by me is now online at - authors, if I don't ilnk to you or messed up your URL, email me at rachel at

You can also find guidelines for the 2011 edition there. Major thanks to Brian Van for the web designing and putting up with my many requests. I'm so excited and told Brian tonight that if it's that easy, I should make more websites.

We'll be launching author video interviews very soon too, starting with the incredibly Diana Joseph, author of I'm Sorry You Feel That Way, of Mankato, Minnesota, who's reading this Thursday along with Susan Shapiro, Amy Sohn, Julie Metz, Joshua Lyon, Kerry Cohen and me at In The Flesh Reading Series. Her piece, which opens the 2010 edition, is from her book and is called "The Girl Who Only Sometimes Said No." It's amazing. She's the kind of honest, unapologetic mom I hope to be someday.

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Friday, September 11, 2009

All the cupcake ladies

I'm off to Chicago this week for an unofficial cupcake summit and a bazillion cupcake tastings; join me Saturday from 12-2 at Swirlz for FREE mini cupcakes!

In addition to the amazing cupcake ladies seen above, who totally rock my world and are each incredibly inspiring in their own right, I'm also going to hopefully see my cousin Cindy and her 5-year-old son Jack (yes, he's also my cousin), Nona Willis Aronowitz, co-author of Girldrive, Kirsten Goede, maker of the gorgeously sparkling jewelry line Objets d'Envy and Elizabeth Elmore, whose lyrics with Sarge and especially The Reputation have inspired me more than I can say (and whose song "Fast Girls" I'm quoting in my introduction to my anthology Fast Girls). It'll be a busy but very sweet weekend of cupcakes, pizza, girl talk and gossip.

See Flickr (and the cupcake only Flickr) and Twitter (and @cupcakeblog) for updates all weekend.

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Monday, September 07, 2009

What happened at Quickies

We had a huge number of readers (9!) on Friday night for Quickies, a Brazilian film crew, and a lot of fun! I have no idea if I have the time or energy for another quickies, so that may be the end (but In The Flesh is going strong), so pay attention/get a postcard/follow us on Facebook/Twitter (links at on In The Flesh page). If you liked Melissa Febos's pee-filled excerpt from her forthcoming memoir Whip Smart, make sure you come back for BDSM Night March 18th! And obviously, don't miss superstar night at In The Flesh September 17th with Susan Shapiro, Amy Sohn, Joshua Lyon, Julie Metz, Kerry Cohen and Diana Joseph! (Seriously, you will kick yourself hard if you miss this.) And postcards are now in! Send your US mailing address to rachelkramerbussel at with "ITF Postcard" in the subject if you want one. There are plenty!

Of course there were the usual 100 FREE Baked by Melissa cupcakes which were very quickly devoured!

Sorry about photo quality/scarcity, we may get some more in, this is a lowkey, no budget affair so, no real photos save for my iPhone.

Whip Smart author Melissa Febos whipped the night into shape with an excerpt about her first day as a pro domme.

Michelle Robinson read a supernatural (I think that's the right word) that scared me but was also very hot that will be published next year.

Jackson West proved that Sarah Palin erotica (his story is called "Sarah Palin: The Agony and the Ecstasy") is still timely. And Sarah Palin impersonator extraordinaire Sara Benincasa was in the audience!

Jackson West shot this photo of me in my paparazzi moment. We should have video at some point from the Brazilian TV crew, who also interviewed several readers.

Said Brazilian TV crew who asked amazing questions (ummm...yes, I have gotten spanked in the downstairs of Happy Ending and had phone sex outside the bar, though I didn't reveal quite all those details because really, you should come for the crazy hot readers and free snacks, not to hook up).

That being said, I spied a couple making out in a booth and I know that at least one set of people met that night and left together, so...make of that what you will.

Thanks to everyone who read, the TV crew, and Frank at Happy Ending for another fabulous night of smut. I even had one newcomer who I've been trying to get to read who I just may have convinced with this Quickies, so that's a coup.

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Friday, September 04, 2009

Quickies tonight, free cupcakes and very special erotica, be there!

September 4, 7:30-8:30
Readers have six minutes to turn you on with erotica and true sex stories. Featuring Jackson West reading Sarah Palin erotica, Melissa Febos reading from her dominatrix memoir Whip Smart, Madlyn March reading from the classic Gail Parent novel Sheila Levine is Dead and Living in New York (see cover below), comedian Kelli Dunham, erotica writer Michelle Robinson, columnist John DeVore, and Rocco Ernest Privetera. Hosted by Rachel Kramer Bussel (Bottoms Up, Spanked, The Mile High Club). Free cupcakes from Baked by Melissa.
(B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey or F/V to 2nd Avenue,
Between Forsyth & Eldridge. Look for the hot pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club."
Admission: Free, 21+ only
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676

Madlyn March will read two short scenes from this classic novel by Gail Parent, Sheila Levine is Dead and Living in New York.

plus 100 free cupcakes from Baked by Melissa

Kelli Dunham ( is everyone's favorite ex nun dorky boi-girl comic. She is also the author of four books of humorous nonfiction and a contributor to numerous anthologies. Despite being almost middle-aged, she has never once waited for a bus at Port Authority without being challenged by the truancy police.

Melissa Febos is the author of the memoir Whip Smart, forthcoming from St. Martin’s Press in 2010. Her writing has been featured in The Southeast Review, Redivider, The Rambler, Storyscape Journal, Bitch Magazine, and Smut Magazine, among many others. She co-curates and hosts the Mixer Reading and Music Series at Cake Shop, and teaches at SUNY Purchase College and The Gotham Writers’ Workshop. She holds an MFA from Sarah Lawrence College, and lives in Brooklyn. More information about her can be found at

Madlyn March is the pseudonym of a Brooklyn journalist who has had articles published in The New York Post, Self, Time Out New York, Parenting, and AfterEllen, to name but a few. Erotica credits include First-Timers, Spanked, Ultimate Lesbian Erotica 2009, Do Not Disturb, and the e-book Love Notes.

Rocco Ernest Privetera started in NYC ten years ago doing comedy and theater, and now performs adult improv and tells his own ribald storytelling. He plays piano for friends comedy shows, enjoys scandalizing his siblings with filthy web videos and tells stories about the things that fascinate him: food, sex, science, and birds.

Michelle Janine Robinson is the author of three novels being published by Simon & Schuster; Color Me Grey, More Than Meets The Eye and Serial Typical. Michelle's short story "Mi Destino" was included in Zane's New York Times Bestseller Caramel Flava and her short story contribution "The Quiet Room" was the first featured story in the Times Bestseller Succulent: Chocolate Flava II. Michelle has contributed to other anthologies, such as Purple Panties, with the story she wrote titled “Hailey's Orgasmic Splendor” and Honey Flava with the story "The Flow of Qi. "Michelle is also a contributor to the oral sex-themed anthology, Tasting Him, with her story “A Tongue Is Just A Tongue,” edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel.

Jackson West is trying to get over himself and write more fiction. Until then, his non-fiction work and attempts at oversharing can be found on, a veritable firehose of online nonsense.

And look what you can win - so appropriately, we'll have a copy of Wicked Quickies to give away!

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Thursday, September 03, 2009


Thanks for helping put my Cake Wrecks article and photo gallery into the third most-read piece at The Daily Beast. Maybe it's tacky to post this, but I don't care. Call me tacky, just click on the link and pass it on.

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Wednesday, September 02, 2009

My Daily Beast piece about Cake Wrecks

Went up today! I wrote a profile of Cake Wrecks founder/blogger Jen Yates and got art for a pretty wacky photo gallery, if I do say so myself. Divorce cake? Baby mama cake, anyone? Please check it out and pass it on to someone who could use a smile. And if you're so inclined as to comment, that would rock too. I am shameless enough to confess on this little non-blog here that I would like it to crack the top 5 most popular stories, in part because I'm just competitive like that, and in part because I want The Daily Beast editors to keep assigning me stuff. And because Cake Wrecks rocks (see my piece for some details about the upcoming book tour).

Here's the handy Daily Beast link again.

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