Can't Think Straight author Kiri Blakeley on professional jealousy

I liked this column by Kiri Blakeley on professional jealousy, such as bookstore placement of Rachel Shukert's books (my sex column tomorrow is on jealousy regarding relationships) - it's funny because I'm jealous that her publisher got her video of her reading at In The Flesh posted on Barnes & Noble while Amazon basically has ignored my Passion video that I had recut just for them. But then I tell myself that the two are unrelated, and that it's true, there is literally not a thing I can do about that, except choose whether or not making book trailers is worth it financially in future. Here's what Kiri had to say:

When it comes to other women, however, I merely ask myself the questions. I don’t have the answers. Why one person gets something that you don’t is entirely out of our control the vast majority of the time, and there have been plenty of times I have accomplished something that other writers haven’t. Somewhere, some woman might even be thinking, “Why does that Kiri Blakeley get to rant on Forbes and I don’t?”

Women, however, are not supposed to be jealous of other women. It’s petty, it’s immature, it’s damaging to the notion of sisterhood. Men don’t get jealous of each other—men give each other jobs. Men don’t get “jealous,” they get “healthily competitive.”

But I say hoo-ha to all of that. Let’s call it what it really is.

“Jealousy, if channeled positively, can do wonders,” says Hannah Seligson, author of New Girl On the Job: Advice From the Trenches. Seligson, for example, was jealous of people who got their bylines in the New York Times (the newspaper of record also seems to be the newspaper of bitter envy). So Seligson made it her goal to get her name in there too. Eventually, she became a regular Times contributor.

And if you missed it, you can read my interview with Kiri Blakely at SexIs.

Media Sex Night tonight! Memoir, burlesque, erotica, cupcakes, chocolate-covered pretzels and more!

In The Flesh logo by Molly Crabapple

There is no RSVP requirement, but if you'd like to RSVP and/or spread the word on Facebook, click here for the Media Sex Night event listing. See also the In The Flesh Reading Series fan page on Facebook. Note early start time.

IN THE FLESH EROTIC READING SERIES
MEDIA SEX NIGHT
July 15, 2010, 7:30 pm - 10 pm
AT HAPPY ENDING LOUNGE, 302 BROOME STREET, NYC
(B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey or F/V to 2nd Avenue, http://www.happyendinglounge.com)
Between Forsyth & Eldridge. Look for the hot pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club."
Admission: Free
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676
http://www.inthefleshreadingseries.com

Media superstars invade In The Flesh. Featuring Kevin Allison (The State, RISK show), Penny Arcade (Bitch! Dyke! Faghag! Whore!), Twanna A. Hines (FunkyBrownChick.com), Jillian Lauren (New York Times bestselling author of Some Girls: My Life in a Harem), Paulie & Pauline (Off The Set), Jerry Portwood (New York Press), Rachel Shukert (Everything Is Going to Be Great) and reading plus performance from Jo Weldon (The Burlesque Handbook). Hosted by Rachel Kramer Bussel (Fast Girls, Please, Sir, Please, Ma’am). Sponsored by New York Press. Books will be available for sale by Mobile Libris. 100 free copies of Sexis Magazine will be distributed. Free Baked by Melissa cupcakes, candy and chips will be served. This is the countdown to the final In The Flesh December 16th so don't miss a very special night!

In the Flesh is a monthly reading series hosted at the appropriately named
Happy Ending Lounge, and features the country's best erotic writers sharing stories to get you hot and bothered, hosted and curated by acclaimed erotic writer and editor Rachel Kramer Bussel. The series was named Best Reading Series by New York Press in 2009. From erotic poetry to down and dirty smut, these authors get naked on the page and will make you lust after them and their words. Since its debut in October 2005, In the Flesh has featured such authors as Mike Albo, Laura Antoniou, Mo Beasley, Susie Bright, Lily Burana, Jessica Cutler, Mike Daisey, Stephen Elliott, Valerie Frankel, Polly Frost, Gael Greene, Andy Horwitz, Debra Hyde, Maxim Jakubowski, Emily Scarlet Kramer of CAKE, Josh Kilmer-Purcell, Edith Layton, Logan Levkoff, Suzanne Portnoy, Julie Powell, Sofia Quintero, M.J. Rose, Lauren Sanders, Danyel Smith, Grant Stoddard, Cecilia Tan, Carol Taylor, Dana Vachon, Veronica Vera, Susan Wright, Zane and many others. The series has gotten press attention from the New York Times’s UrbanEye, Daily Candy, Escape (Hong Kong), Flavorpill, The L Magazine, New York Magazine, NBC New York, New York Post, New York Observer, Philadelphia City Paper, Time Out New York, Flavorwire, Fork in the Road, Gawker, Gothamist, Jezebel.com, Nerve.com, Serious Eats, Tasting Table and Wonkette, and has been praised by Dr. Ruth.

Kevin Allison is a member of the legendary sketch comedy troupe The State, whose series on MTV in the mid-90s was influential for many of today's comics. He is the creator and host of RISK!, a popular live show and audio podcast where people tell true tales they never thought they'd dare to share. The live show won the ECNY Award for Best Variety Show in New York of 2009 and the podcast version of RISK! has been downloaded nearly 700,000 times now. Kevin's recent film and TV appearances include Reno 911!: Miami, The Ten, Wedding Daze, VH1’s Best Week Ever, Comedy Central’s Viva Variety and Stella, and HBO’s Flight of the Conchords. Behind the scenes, Kevin has written for Blue Man Group Productions and JibJab. In the print world, Kevin’s writing has appeared in The Village Voice, Giant, Premiere and Film Journal. He has served as the Artistic Director of The Peoples Improv Theater in New York and teaches comedy writing there, at New York University, at The Philly Improv Theater and online at www.filmlab.ca. He can be reached at Kevin at risk-show.com .



Penny Arcade aka Susana Ventura is an internationally acclaimed and respected performance, theater, video artist, as well as a writer, poet, essayist, and cultural icon. She is one of the few performance artists to gain international renown in the mainstream entertainment world. Bad Reputation [Semiotext(e)] is the first book about Penny Arcade and her work.


photo by Jasmine Hirst

Rachel Kramer Bussel is an author, editor, blogger and reading series host. She is Senior Editor at Penthouse Variations and a former sex columnist for The Village Voice. She’s edited over 30 anthologies, including the kink-themed Spanked, Bottoms Up, Yes, Sir, Yes, Ma'am, He's on Top, She's on Top, Rubber Sex as well as Fast Girls, Orgasmic, Peep Show, The Mile High Club: Plane Sex Stories, Do Not Disturb: Hotel Sex Stories, Tasting Him, Tasting Her, and the non-fiction Best Sex Writing series. Her books won 3 2009 Independent Publisher Awards. Her writing been published in publications such as Clean Sheets, Cosmopolitan, The Daily Beast, Fresh Yarn, Huffington Post, Mediabistro, Newsday, New York Post, San Francisco Chronicle, Tango, The Village Voice, and Time Out New York, and in over 100 anthologies, including Best American Erotica 2004 and 2006. Rachel conducts nationwide readings and erotic writing workshops. She has hosted In The Flesh since October 2005.
www.rachelkramerbussel.com


photo by Anya Garrett

Twanna A. Hines is a sex, dating and relationships writer. She has written for Huffington Post, Lifetime, Nerve, New York Press, Fast Company and others. She has appeared on CNN, NPR, Sirius Satellite Radio as well as CBC, and she has been quoted in the Village Voice, New York magazine, Gawker Media, The San Francisco Chronicle,
EbonyJet, The Baltimore Sun, Vibe and elsewhere. AOL recognized her award-winning site, FUNKY BROWN CHICK®. She attended New York University and other schools. Her B.S. and M.A. degrees are in sociology. Having lived in London, Chicago, Amsterdam, Los Angeles and The Hague, she speaks English and Dutch fluently as well as conversational French. She enjoys passionate love affairs with faraway lands and intelligent men. Get down with the funky brown! ™
www.funkybrownchick.com



Jillian Lauren’s is the author of the memoir Some Girls: My Life in a Harem, Plume 2010. She has an MFA from Antioch University and her writing has appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, Flaunt Magazine and Opium Magazine, among others. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband and son. Her novel, Pretty, is scheduled to be released from Plume in Spring 2011.
www.jillianlauren.com



Paulie & Pauline seek out candid moments in the human experience with a curiosity that is heavily influenced by their backgrounds in journalism and sociology. Mostly, though, their photos reflect their voyeuristic fascination with people and their stories. Photos from Off the Set: Porn Stars and Their Partners have been published in print and online, appeared in several group exhibitions of fine-art photography, and are included in the permanent collections at the Museum of Sex in New York City and the art gallery at the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender, and Reproduction.
www.paulieandpauline.com

Jerry Portwood is the editor-in-chief of New York Press. He is also the founding editor of CityArts, an arts-only newsweekly focused on arts and culture in NYC. His short fiction and essays have appeared in regional and international publications. He keeps saying he's working on a book.



Rachel Shukert is the author of Everything Is Going to Be Great and Have You No Shame? and Other Regrettable Stories. Her work has been featured on National Public Radio, as well as in Salon, McSweeny's, Slate, The Daily Beast, and Gawker, among others. She has contributed to several notable print anthologies, including Click: When We Knew We Were Feminists, Best Sex Writing (Rachel Kramer Bussel, ed.) and Best American Poetry. She is a contributing editor at Tablet Magazine. Her first feature screenplay is currently in development with Yarn Films.
rachelshukert.com



Jo Weldon is the Headmistress and Founder of the New York School of Burlesque. Internationally renowned as burlesque personality Jo Boobs, she's rounded her heels on stages from Coney Island to Las Vegas. She's the winner of such exotic titles as Best Bump N Grinder, Best Teacher and Mentor, and Biggest Cougar in Burlesque! She has worked with performers from Leonard Cohen to Spinal Tap, and has been featured on television shows from CBS Sunday Morning to Gossip Girl. Her book, The Burlesque Handbook: A Backstage Guide, featuring a foreword by Margaret Cho, was released by HarperCollins/ItBooks in June 2010.
www.schoolofburlesque.com



You will hear from the following books:


The Burlesque Handbook by Jo Weldon


Some Girls: My life in a Harem by Jillian Lauren


Everything Is Going to Be Great: An Underfunded and Overexposed European Grand Tour by Rachel Shukert


Off The Set: Porn Stars and Their Partners by Paulie & Pauline

(see Madison Young reading from Off the Set at In The Flesh here)

Next In The Flesh July 15th - Media Sex Night with NYT bestsellers, comedians, bloggers, burlesque & more!

In The Flesh logo by Molly Crabapple

There is no RSVP requirement, but if you'd like to RSVP and/or spread the word on Facebook, click here for the Media Sex Night event listing. See also the In The Flesh Reading Series fan page on Facebook. Note early start time.

IN THE FLESH EROTIC READING SERIES
MEDIA SEX NIGHT
July 15, 2010, 7:30 pm - 10 pm
AT HAPPY ENDING LOUNGE, 302 BROOME STREET, NYC
(B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey or F/V to 2nd Avenue, http://www.happyendinglounge.com)
Between Forsyth & Eldridge. Look for the hot pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club."
Admission: Free
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676
http://www.inthefleshreadingseries.com

Media superstars invade In The Flesh. Featuring Kevin Allison (The State, RISK show), Penny Arcade (Bitch! Dyke! Faghag! Whore!), Twanna A. Hines (FunkyBrownChick.com), Jillian Lauren (New York Times bestselling author of Some Girls: My Life in a Harem), Paulie & Pauline (Off The Set), Jerry Portwood (New York Press), Rachel Shukert (Everything Is Going to Be Great) and reading plus performance from Jo Weldon (The Burlesque Handbook). Hosted by Rachel Kramer Bussel (Fast Girls, Please, Sir, Please, Ma’am). Sponsored by New York Press. 100 free copies of Sexis Magazine will be distributed. Free Baked by Melissa cupcakes, candy and chips will be served. This is the countdown to the final In The Flesh December 16th so don't miss a very special night!

In the Flesh is a monthly reading series hosted at the appropriately named
Happy Ending Lounge, and features the country's best erotic writers sharing stories to get you hot and bothered, hosted and curated by acclaimed erotic writer and editor Rachel Kramer Bussel. The series was named Best Reading Series by New York Press in 2009. From erotic poetry to down and dirty smut, these authors get naked on the page and will make you lust after them and their words. Since its debut in October 2005, In the Flesh has featured such authors as Mike Albo, Laura Antoniou, Mo Beasley, Susie Bright, Lily Burana, Jessica Cutler, Mike Daisey, Stephen Elliott, Valerie Frankel, Polly Frost, Gael Greene, Andy Horwitz, Debra Hyde, Maxim Jakubowski, Emily Scarlet Kramer of CAKE, Josh Kilmer-Purcell, Edith Layton, Logan Levkoff, Suzanne Portnoy, Julie Powell, Sofia Quintero, M.J. Rose, Lauren Sanders, Danyel Smith, Grant Stoddard, Cecilia Tan, Carol Taylor, Dana Vachon, Veronica Vera, Susan Wright, Zane and many others. The series has gotten press attention from the New York Times’s UrbanEye, Escape (Hong Kong), Flavorpill, The L Magazine, New York Magazine, NBC New York, New York Post, New York Observer, Philadelphia City Paper, Time Out New York, Flavorwire, Fork in the Road, Gawker, Gothamist, Jezebel.com, Nerve.com, Serious Eats, Tasting Table and Wonkette, and has been praised by Dr. Ruth.

Kevin Allison is a member of the legendary sketch comedy troupe The State, whose series on MTV in the mid-90s was influential for many of today's comics. He is the creator and host of RISK!, a popular live show and audio podcast where people tell true tales they never thought they'd dare to share. The live show won the ECNY Award for Best Variety Show in New York of 2009 and the podcast version of RISK! has been downloaded nearly 700,000 times now. Kevin's recent film and TV appearances include Reno 911!: Miami, The Ten, Wedding Daze, VH1’s Best Week Ever, Comedy Central’s Viva Variety and Stella, and HBO’s Flight of the Conchords. Behind the scenes, Kevin has written for Blue Man Group Productions and JibJab. In the print world, Kevin’s writing has appeared in The Village Voice, Giant, Premiere and Film Journal. He has served as the Artistic Director of The Peoples Improv Theater in New York and teaches comedy writing there, at New York University, at The Philly Improv Theater and online at www.filmlab.ca. He can be reached at Kevin at risk-show.com .



Penny Arcade aka Susana Ventura is an internationally acclaimed and respected performance, theater, video artist, as well as a writer, poet, essayist, and cultural icon. She is one of the few performance artists to gain international renown in the mainstream entertainment world. Bad Reputation [Semiotext(e)] is the first book about Penny Arcade and her work.


photo by Jasmine Hirst

Rachel Kramer Bussel is an author, editor, blogger and reading series host. She is Senior Editor at Penthouse Variations and a former sex columnist for The Village Voice. She’s edited over 30 anthologies, including the kink-themed Spanked, Bottoms Up, Yes, Sir, Yes, Ma'am, He's on Top, She's on Top, Rubber Sex as well as Fast Girls, Orgasmic, Peep Show, The Mile High Club: Plane Sex Stories, Do Not Disturb: Hotel Sex Stories, Tasting Him, Tasting Her, and the non-fiction Best Sex Writing series. Her books won 3 2009 Independent Publisher Awards. Her writing been published in publications such as Clean Sheets, Cosmopolitan, The Daily Beast, Fresh Yarn, Huffington Post, Mediabistro, Newsday, New York Post, San Francisco Chronicle, Tango, The Village Voice, and Time Out New York, and in over 100 anthologies, including Best American Erotica 2004 and 2006. Rachel conducts nationwide readings and erotic writing workshops. She has hosted In The Flesh since October 2005.
www.rachelkramerbussel.com


photo by Anya Garrett

Twanna A. Hines is a sex, dating and relationships writer. She has written for Huffington Post, Lifetime, Nerve, New York Press, Fast Company and others. She has appeared on CNN, NPR, Sirius Satellite Radio as well as CBC, and she has been quoted in the Village Voice, New York magazine, Gawker Media, The San Francisco Chronicle,
EbonyJet, The Baltimore Sun, Vibe and elsewhere. AOL recognized her award-winning site, FUNKY BROWN CHICK®. She attended New York University and other schools. Her B.S. and M.A. degrees are in sociology. Having lived in London, Chicago, Amsterdam, Los Angeles and The Hague, she speaks English and Dutch fluently as well as conversational French. She enjoys passionate love affairs with faraway lands and intelligent men. Get down with the funky brown! ™
www.funkybrownchick.com



Jillian Lauren’s is the author of the memoir Some Girls: My Life in a Harem, Plume 2010. She has an MFA from Antioch University and her writing has appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, Flaunt Magazine and Opium Magazine, among others. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband and son. Her novel, Pretty, is scheduled to be released from Plume in Spring 2011.
www.jillianlauren.com



Paulie & Pauline seek out candid moments in the human experience with a curiosity that is heavily influenced by their backgrounds in journalism and sociology. Mostly, though, their photos reflect their voyeuristic fascination with people and their stories. Photos from Off the Set: Porn Stars and Their Partners have been published in print and online, appeared in several group exhibitions of fine-art photography, and are included in the permanent collections at the Museum of Sex in New York City and the art gallery at the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender, and Reproduction.
www.paulieandpauline.com

Jerry Portwood is the editor-in-chief of New York Press. He is also the founding editor of CityArts, an arts-only newsweekly focused on arts and culture in NYC. His short fiction and essays have appeared in regional and international publications. He keeps saying he's working on a book.



Rachel Shukert is the author of Everything Is Going to Be Great and Have You No Shame? and Other Regrettable Stories. Her work has been featured on National Public Radio, as well as in Salon, McSweeny's, Slate, The Daily Beast, and Gawker, among others. She has contributed to several notable print anthologies, including Click: When We Knew We Were Feminists, Best Sex Writing (Rachel Kramer Bussel, ed.) and Best American Poetry. She is a contributing editor at Tablet Magazine. Her first feature screenplay is currently in development with Yarn Films.
rachelshukert.com



Jo Weldon is the Headmistress and Founder of the New York School of Burlesque. Internationally renowned as burlesque personality Jo Boobs, she's rounded her heels on stages from Coney Island to Las Vegas. She's the winner of such exotic titles as Best Bump N Grinder, Best Teacher and Mentor, and Biggest Cougar in Burlesque! She has worked with performers from Leonard Cohen to Spinal Tap, and has been featured on television shows from CBS Sunday Morning to Gossip Girl. Her book, The Burlesque Handbook: A Backstage Guide, featuring a foreword by Margaret Cho, was released by HarperCollins/ItBooks in June 2010.
www.schoolofburlesque.com



You will hear from the following books:


The Burlesque Handbook by Jo Weldon


Some Girls: My life in a Harem by Jillian Lauren


Everything Is Going to Be Great: An Underfunded and Overexposed European Grand Tour by Rachel Shukert


Off The Set: Porn Stars and Their Partners by Paulie & Pauline

(see Madison Young reading from Off the Set at In The Flesh here)

Tonight: How I Learned to be Super Successful!

The How I Learned Reading Series presents:
HOW I LEARNED TO BE SUPER SUCCESSFUL!

Featuring:
PATRICE EVANS (AKA TAN)
("The Assimilated Negro," Gawker, New York Times, NPR, several enviable accomplishments)
DAVE HILL
(Dave Hill Explosion, King of Miami, This American Life, basically a renaissance man)
RACHEL SHUKERT
(Have You No Shame? And Other Regrettable Stories, Ars Nova, also gorgeous and crazy-popular)
S.L. WISENBERG
(The Adventures of Cancer Bitch, plus a list of successes that would seriously blow your mind)

Hosted by BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, April 22nd, 8PM
FREE
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street, NYC
between Forsyth & Eldridge
Look for the hot pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club."
(212) 334-9676
Get directions

***



See the How I Learned Reading Series site for reader bios and more info. And the awesome Blaise K is reading May 21st at In The Flesh!

the Rachel Shukert trifecta

Have You No Shame? author Rachel Shukert and I at In The Flesh (photo by Stacie Joy).

Rachel's been writing a LOT. Here are some of her recent pieces:

The story she read at In The Flesh (we didn't tape July, sorry)
"Unsanitary pad - My night in Nebraska's most terrifying lovenest," Nerve

"Why I Hate Summer," Salon

"The Protocols: An Introduction," Jewcy

The Rachel Shukert interview, parts 3 and 4

And here's the rest of my 2nd Avenue Deli interview with Rachel Shukert (read/watch the post below this first). Part 3:



Part 4:

The Rachel Shukert interview, parts 1 and 2

Last Thursday, in what turned out to be a very New York meandering night, one in which, incidentally, I never made it home, I started off the evening at the new 2nd Avenue Deli, which is not actually on 2nd Avenue anymore. I was there with Rachel Shukert, who I think I first heard read at KGB, talking about sex at BBYO (Jewish youth group), which she also tackles in her first book, an essay collection called Have You No Shame? And Other Regrettable Stories.

Then I published her Heeb piece "Big Mouth Strikes Again" in Best Sex Writing 2008 and she read at the book's release party. Over bulging sandwiches and pickles and black cherry soda (for her), we chatted about family and dating and sex.

And then I asked her about her book, which I highly recommend. I'll have more to say on it later, but wanted to get this posted, along with parts 3 and 4 of the interview. There's some background noise, but I think it was worth it for the atmosphere. For now, part 1:



and part 2:

Rachel Shukert on Jewish girls and blowjobs

Do read my awesome interview with Best Sex Writing 2008 contributor Rachel Shukert, pictured below, about Jewish girls and blowjobs.