Yesterday my first piece for Crushable went up - I interviewed comedian Heather McDonald about her New York Times-bestselling memoir You'll Never Blue Ball in This Town Again: One Woman's Painfully Funny Quest to Give It Up. She was a virgin until age 27, mostly by choice, but not for moral or religious reasons, which is an unusual and interesting angle. Please check it out.
Heather wound up waiting until she was 27, finally putting her birth control pills to work and going all with Ray, one of only three men she’s slept with. That scene and her description of him as “really consistent” and “really great” is anticlimactic in both sense of the word; Heather was simply ready, and he was a good guy, and he was there. “I was just trying to do my best to appear as though I had done this monumental act before,” she writes. She follows this up, though, with a lively ending when the man she goes on to marry winds up becoming a dad from a one-night stand, making her an instant stepmom.
“My advice would be past a certain age, unless you feel like he can handle it, I don’t think you need to tell them. If you want to tell them later, you can: by the way, you were my first. But I think the way I did it was wise,” she explains. “I didn’t want him to stick around longer because of guilt.”
Now happily married, she does sometimes miss the good old days. “I love when the guy’s in his underwear and you’re making out, doing the dryhumping grind. Or when you spend the night and you haven’t had sex and then every two hours there’s a boner in your butt. Once you do it you can’t go back.” Heather knows from experience; she sometimes tries to get her husband to pretend that they’re back in that stage, but he’s quite not as fond of blueballing as she is.
Read the full interview here.