But what if we want to be hyper-sexualized?

So, The Harvard Crimson examined Ariel Levy's Female Chauvinist Pigs and concludes with this circular bit of illogic so pervasive in today's know-it-all feminism:

Levy makes a point that all girls at this university need to consider—that female liberation should mean freedom to do as we please, not to be as hyper-sexualized as possible.

I do think examining why cultural trends occur is important, but at the end of the day, you either want people to make decisions for themselves or you don't. Part of accepting the responsibility of freedom, autonomy and maturity is allowing women, and men, to make both "good" and "bad" choices for themselves. I could do without the judgment of those choices, but okay, fine, judge them-but how on earth can you say "liberation" means "freedom to do as we please" and then immediately afterward decry some of the things that please some women? It's a catch-22 that to me negates the very meaning of feminism as I know it. Part of why I harp and harp on this is that I have witnessed such a shift in my thinking and understanding of my own sexuality through the explorations I've gone through, and I know many other women have as well. When I get emails from people saying I'm "brave" for scribbling some words into my computer, it often doesn't compute, but I forget that it may seem brave to some people. To me, it's just writing, it's sortof what I do, what I've always done, but perhaps now for a wider audience. Which is not to say that's everyone's cup of tea-of course it's not.

The problem I see is when someone then takes it upon themselves to castigate me, or Jessica Cutler, or Jenna Jameson, or Christie Hefner, Judith Regan, Paris Hilton, etc. We are not ruining your sex life. We are not telling you how to behave. We are not saying you should not run for President. What I think this whole wave of sexually open, out-there, tell-it-like-it-us women are doing is freeing themselves from the good girl/bad girl dichotomy. We're saying that we know we'll be judged by our pussies not matter what the fuck else we do, so why not talk about sex? And really, why not? Women go from saints to sluts in seconds, the minute we piss anyone off, the minute anything goes wrong you're just a whore anyway, so why not go all out and claim the sex you're having anyway? Because I think what these people's issue with the openness around sex is not the doing, but the talking. The showing. The claiming. The ownership. The bravada. The unashaamedness. Everyone who wants to harken back to the glorious 1950's (um, hello, era of BETTIE PAGE!) is looking to shove all of that under the rug, so to speak. They openly admit that people did all the same things we do now (in fact, Pornified opens with just such a reminiscence), but the problem now is that we won't shut our big fat mouths.

I just do not believe we are living in a "monoculture of eroticism." I mean, I look at Fleshbot and TGP and see sites devoted to naked girls in the snow and girls with colds! There is a type of porn for every fetish, but I don't even think that's the answer-I am not trying to push purchases on people in exploring their sexuality. But by saying there's a monoculture, I in fact think these critics are pushing for a monoculture. There's a huge, flourishing burlesque revival going on, where girls who are certainly not part of this monoculture are shaking their tits and asses and wanting that attention as much as any Girl Gone Wild. Yes, it's a different vibe, but is the impulse not somewhat the same?

And to defend my own job for a moment, in my magazine, we explore ALL KINDS of fetishes and fantasies. It is in no way a freaking monoculture, in fact, the very opposite. I have learned so much about the various forms human sexuality takes and am always fascinated to learn about more. I think it's a very, very narrow view of the world and sex and bodies and fantasies to see it the way she does. I feel that SEXUAL FREEDOM can only happen when we are not trying to be liberated from each other, but when we learn to encompass those whose sexualities are in the minority, who are looking to claim their place in the sexual arena, anad if they don't see themselves reflected, they create their own smut reflecting their desires. But "freedom" is not a word that means "freedom to fuck the way I want you to" - at least, it shouldn't be. Just as free speech does not mean only speech you agree with, sexual freedom, true freedom, cannot mean the freedom to only engage in nice, safe, perfect, pretty, simple, easy, 100% equal, nothing tying it to the real world sex. Because in real life, sex is messy and complicated and we work things out through sex that may have to do with all sorts of things other than direct physical arousal. It's about our brains and our bodies, about the convergence of the two, and if for some people that means stripping and fucking on film and blogging and being slutty and wild and whatever else these scolds disapprove of, then so be it. I would rather renounce being a feminist and stand in favor of sexual freedom than have to be some toe-the-line feminist constantly asking the sex police if the way I want to fuck is okay.