From Lemondrop to Tumblr and back to Lemondrop: Excuses for not drinking

What I love about Tumblr is how fast you can see what people react to; it's instaneous. They can just click "like" or reblog or comment and what's interesting is what people respond to.

I posted a short response about not drinking that spawned lots of reaction and...a post on Lemondrop (very cool site owned by AOL), quoting me, Lena Chen, Maria Diaz and Amber L. Rhea. It's not that surprising since I was responding to a post on Lemondrop about a woman who had to feign excuses for not drinking, lest everyone know she was pregnant. I didn't even know about it until, ironically, last night I was out with a friend at Spuyten Duyvil in Williamsburg, and she bought me two sparkling wines (yes, I broke my no more drinking in 2010 rule but it was in the name of girl talk) and she told me that AOL is her homepage and she clicked on a headline about "social drinking" and found my name! Love the small worldness. Thanks, Lemondrop and their interesting commenters. It's a fascinating site.

Here's the entirety of my original post, titled "Maybe instead of commentary on pregnancy this is about how fucked we are around alcohol:"

I despise the "You don't drink?" question when meeting new people. It seems to come with a tinge of "What the fuck is wrong with you?" Maybe I'm projecting, but still, it definitely comes with a tinge of, "You are not like the rest of us." I mean, really - pregnant or not, can we just drink or not drink on any given night and not have it be a bfd?

From Lemondrop:

"I had my 10-year high school reunion when I was only a few months pregnant. It was at a local bar and everyone was drinking, so I ordered a club soda with lime and told people it was a vodka tonic. I also wore a babydoll shirt to cover my growing pooch."
-- Sara, 30, Roanoke, Va.

"When I was eight weeks pregnant, I went to a wedding and drank water out of a Miller Light can all night. I also avoided my best friend Shannon for six weeks because I knew I couldn't hide it from her." -- Ashley, 34, Atlanta

I don't think there's some culture war between drinkers and non-drinkers (nor do I think those two groups are totally discrete, people are often one or the other in their lifetime) but it's interesting how it's perceived and how different locations (one commenter writes from a college campus in the South) affect their treatment.

In The Flesh author photo

From last night at In The Flesh Reading Series


Back: Trans-Atlantic Friedman, Beatnik For Hire (bongo player), Mike Edison, Wickham Boyle, Blaise Allyson Kearsley, Mike Daisey, Maria Diaz
Front: Nancy Balbirer, Rachel Kramer Bussel, Megan Carpentier

Photo: Jen Peters

There were also cupcakes:


Baked by Melissa mini cupcakes


Baked by Melissa mini cupcakes

And bongo playing!

True Sex Confessions Night TONIGHT!

Thanks to all the great local publications who've covered this reading and to my friends/helpers (they will be passing out all the candy/chips/cupcakes/index cards to write your confessions on): Desiree, Diva, and Tess!

The always fabulous (subscribe! it's free!) New York Times UrbanEye newsletter said:

the In the Flesh series at Happy Ending features the monologist Mike Daisey, the memoirists Mike Edison (“I Have Fun Everywhere I Go”) and Nancy Balbirer (“Take Your Shirt Off and Cry;” ex-roomie of Jennifer Aniston) and others sharing their true sex confessions. As always for the wholesome part of you, there will be free cupcakes.

Time Out New York said In The Flesh is "like foreplay for the mind--no strings attached."

New York Press totally gets it:

Part of the In The Flesh reading series, tonight’s event will feature eight guests sharing some of their most intimate secrets. Well, they’re not exactly secrets, since most of the folks performing—including Take Your Shirt Off and Cry author Nancy Balbirer and monologist Mike Daisey—have either published their stories or slept with loudmouths who’ve told everyone all the juicy news already. Still, it will feel illicit to hear them talk about their naked foibles.

The Bottom Line: Give the Internet a break and check out some hot and heavy material with other people.

And New York Daily News gave us a shoutout!

Thanks as well to MurphGuide for the listing.

And if you've never been to Happy Ending Lounge (yes, it's a former massage parlor), it's a gorgeous, sexy, fun space. Also, a small space - I cannot stress enough how much I recommend arriving by 7:30. It will be crowded, but it's worth it, I promise.



Questions about In The Flesh? Email me at rachelkramerbussel at gmail.com - I book generally by invitation only, though I have a few spots left for In The Flesh offshoot Quickies: Short Erotica, Friday, August 7 from 7:30-8:30. For that, send me a short writing sample of what you'd read want to read and a bio.



IN THE FLESH EROTIC READING SERIES
TRUE SEX CONFESSIONS NIGHT
July 16th at 8 PM (doors at 7; we recommend arriving by 7:30 for a seat)
AT HAPPY ENDING LOUNGE, 302 BROOME STREET, NYC
(B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey or F/V to 2nd Avenue, http://www.happyendinglounge.com)
Between Forsyth & Eldridge. Look for the hot pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club."
Admission: Free
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676
http://inthefleshreadingseries.blogspot.com

In The Flesh is bringing back our most popular segment, True Sex Confessions Night! Featuring monologist Mike Daisey (21 Dog Years, If You See Something Say Something), memoirists Nancy Balbirer (Take Your Shirt Off and Cry: A Memoir of Near-Fame Experiences) and Mike Edison (I Have Fun Everywhere I Go), Melissa Gira Grant (Sexerati.com), Megan Carpentier (Jezebel.com), Blaise K (How I Learned Reading Series), Wickham Boyle (Pleasures, The Erotic Edge) and Maria Diaz (contributor, The Lust Chronicles). Hosted and curated by Rachel Kramer Bussel (Best Sex Writing 2009, The Mile High Club, Spanked). Free candy, cookies, chips and 100 mini cupcakes by Baked by Melissa will be served. Audience members will have the opportunity to anonymously share their true sex confessions throughout the night (via index cards that will be read aloud between readers). Free copies of the word game SexySlang will be given away.

In the Flesh is a monthly reading series hosted at the appropriately named Happy Ending Lounge, and features the country's best erotic writers sharing stories to get you hot and bothered, hosted and curated by acclaimed erotic writer and editor Rachel Kramer Bussel. From erotic poetry to down and dirty smut, these authors get naked on the page and will make you lust after them and their words. Since its debut in October 2005, In the Flesh has featured such authors as Laura Antoniou, Mo Beasley, Susie Bright, Lily Burana, Jessica Cutler, Stephen Elliott, Valerie Frankel, Polly Frost, Gael Greene, Andy Horwitz, Debra Hyde, Maxim Jakubowski, Emily Scarlet Kramer of CAKE, Josh Kilmer-Purcell, Edith Layton, Logan Levkoff, Suzanne Portnoy, Sofia Quintero, M.J. Rose, Lauren Sanders, Danyel Smith, Grant Stoddard, Cecilia Tan, Carol Taylor, Dana Vachon, Veronica Vera, Susan Wright, Zane and many others. The series has gotten press attention from the New York Times’s UrbanEye, Escape (Hong Kong), Flavorpill, The L Magazine, New York Magazine, New York Observer, Philadelphia City Paper, Time Out New York, Flavorwire, Gothamist, Jezebel.com, Nerve.com and Wonkette, and has been praised by Dr. Ruth.

Nancy Balbirer's memoir, Take Your Shirt Off and Cry, was published by Bloomsbury in April. She is the author and star of the critically acclaimed solo show I Slept With Jack Kerouac and Other Stories, the co-creator of the cult reading series, Cause Celeb!, and has co-starred on Seinfeld and MTV’s Remote Control. She is a graduate of NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts and is the co-owner, designer and doyenne of the West Village boite, Pasita. She lives with remarkably few regrets in Manhattan with her husband and daughter.
takeyourshirtoffandcry.com


photo by Rob d'Entremont

Wickham Boyle, known as Wicki, wears many hats: writer, journalist, consultant and theater producer. As well as writing about sex and all things erotic, Boyle has written numerous articles on finance, parenting and travel for The New York Times, Savoy, National Geographic, Budget Travel, Real Simple, Gotham, Grace and the Downtown Express. She was one of the founders of Code Magazine, and editor-in-chief of Thrive, a magazine launched in late 2006 dedicated to the baby boom generation. Her essays can be heard on the AARP radio stations during their Prime Time show. Her erotic stories can be found in numerous collections published by Dutton, including the groundbreaking Pleasures and The Erotic Edge.



Rachel Kramer Bussel is an author, editor, blogger and reading series host. She is Senior Editor at Penthouse Variations and a former sex columnist for The Village Voice. She’s edited numerous anthologies, two of which (Up All Night and Glamour Girls) have been Lambda Literary Award finalists, most recently The Mile High Club: Plane Sex Stories, Do Not Disturb: Hotel Sex Stories, Best Sex Writing 2009, Tasting Him, Tasting Her, and Spanked. Her writing been published in publications such as Clean Sheets, Cosmopolitan, The Daily Beast, Fresh Yarn, Huffington Post, Mediabistro, Newsday, New York Post, San Francisco Chronicle, Tango, The Village Voice, and Time Out New York, and in over 100 anthologies, including Best American Erotica 2004 and 2006. She has hosted In The Flesh since October 2005.
www.rachelkramerbussel.com


photo by Hilary McHone

Megan Carpentier is a freelancer writer whose work has appeared on Jezebel.com, Wonkette, The Daily Beast, Glamour's blog Glamocracy, Foreign Policy's Madame Secretary blog, Ms., the Washington Post and Radar. Most of that was not about sex. Before she was an underemployed writer, she was an over-educated, mostly-inebriated lobbyist with a bad attitude and a foul mouth.
chaoticmegan.blogspot.com



Mike Daisey has been called “the master storyteller” and “one of the finest solo performers of his generation” by the New York Times for his groundbreaking monologues. His first film, LAYOVER, was shown at the Cannes Film Festival, and a feature film of his monologue If You See Something Say Something will be released this year. He’s been a guest on the Late Show with David Letterman, a contributor to WIRED, Slate, and Salon, a web contributor to Vanity Fair and Radar Magazine, and his work has been frequently heard on the BBC and NPR. His first book, 21 Dog Years: A Cubedweller’s Tale, was published by the Free Press and he is currently at work on a second book. He has been nominated for the Outer Critics Circle Award and two Drama League Awards, and has been the recipient of the Bay Area Critics Circle Award, three Seattle Times Footlight Awards, and a MacDowell Fellowship. He lives in New York City with his director and collaborator, Jean-Michele Gregory.
www.mikedaisey.com




Maria Diaz is a freelance pop culture and geekery writer based out of New Jersey and once in a while, New York City. She writes the blog BravoFan.com for b5media and is a contributer to British women's blog BitchBuzz. "Room 3025" from The Lust Chronicles was her first published story ever. She is currently working on a fiction zine of dark, sexy stories called Musical Beds. Her personal blog is at MariaDiaz.org.


photo by Amber Wolf

Mike Edison is the former publisher of High Times, a Hustler and Penthouse scribe, the former editor-in-chief of Screw magazine, and author of the memoir I Have Fun Everywhere I Go, plus 28 pornographic novel. In addition, he is known for his eclectic music career, and has collaborated frequently with noted wildmen Jon Spencer and GG Allin. He currently fronts his long-running gospel-blues-punk experiment the Edison Rocket Train, as well as his larger group, the Rocket Train Delta Science Arkestra. He lives and works in New York City.
www.mikeedison.com



Melissa Gira (“jee-rha”) Grant writes about sex & the internet at her award-winning blog, Sexerati. She is a contributor to Black Book and Gawker, and a columnist for $pread magazine. Her essays and reporting appear in Dirty Girls, Best Sex Writing 2008, Valleywag, RH Reality Check, and in Make: magazine & The Frisky. She lives in Brooklyn.
www.melissagira.com



Blaise Allysen Kearsley (also known as Blaise K because she is lazy) is the creator, curator and host of the How I Learned Reading Series at Happy Ending. She is also a writer, photographer and veteran blogger (who doesn't really blog anymore, actually). She has appeared at PS 122, Lolita, Bowery Poetry Club, Freddy's, Lucky 13 and Collective Unconscious. Between her writing and photography she has been featured in Nerve, Vice, Gawker, Gothamist, The Morning News, The Black Table, Jetpac magazine and Playbill, among others, as well as in the books Mortified and Cringe. She believes 2009 might be the year she finally finishes writing her novel, but she also has a lot of YouTube videos to catch up on. You can still stalk her former blog persona at www.bazima.com. (Bazima rhymes with vagina.)

True Sex Confessions July 16th (with audience participation!)

This has been one of the most nightmarish In The Fleshes to book, which is sad cause I love True Sex Confessions Night, but seriously, I sometimes forget all the work that goes into running a reading series. But far the course in a week like this. August and September are booked with amazing lineups, and October is Comedy Sex Night and November is Spanking Night. And after that will be Sex and Food Night, and I plan to have snacks, like mini hot dogs and tater tots if I can figure out how to do it. Cause, well, those are sexy to me.

This is the rare chance for audience participation, and is also one of the highlights of True Sex Confessions Night. Please come, bring friends, pass this on. FREE FREE FREE!



IN THE FLESH EROTIC READING SERIES
TRUE SEX CONFESSIONS NIGHT
July 16th at 8 PM (doors at 7; we recommend arriving by 7:30 for a seat)
AT HAPPY ENDING LOUNGE, 302 BROOME STREET, NYC
(B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey or F/V to 2nd Avenue, http://www.happyendinglounge.com)
Between Forsyth & Eldridge. Look for the hot pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club."
Admission: Free
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676
http://inthefleshreadingseries.blogspot.com

In The Flesh is bringing back our most popular segment, True Sex Confessions Night! Featuring memoirist Mike Edison (I Have Fun Everywhere I Go), Melissa Gira Grant (Sexerati.com), Megan Carpentier (Jezebel.com), Blaise K (How I Learned Reading Series), Wickham Boyle (Pleasures, The Erotic Edge) and Maria Diaz (contributor, The Lust Chronicles). Hosted and curated by Rachel Kramer Bussel (Best Sex Writing 2009, The Mile High Club, Spanked). Free candy, cookies, chips and 100 mini cupcakes by Baked by Melissa will be served. Audience members will have the opportunity to anonymously share their true sex confessions throughout the night (via index cards that will be read aloud between readers). Free copies of the word game SexySlang will be given away.

In the Flesh is a monthly reading series hosted at the appropriately named Happy Ending Lounge, and features the country's best erotic writers sharing stories to get you hot and bothered, hosted and curated by acclaimed erotic writer and editor Rachel Kramer Bussel. From erotic poetry to down and dirty smut, these authors get naked on the page and will make you lust after them and their words. Since its debut in October 2005, In the Flesh has featured such authors as Laura Antoniou, Mo Beasley, Susie Bright, Lily Burana, Jessica Cutler, Stephen Elliott, Valerie Frankel, Polly Frost, Gael Greene, Andy Horwitz, Debra Hyde, Maxim Jakubowski, Emily Scarlet Kramer of CAKE, Josh Kilmer-Purcell, Edith Layton, Logan Levkoff, Suzanne Portnoy, Sofia Quintero, M.J. Rose, Lauren Sanders, Danyel Smith, Grant Stoddard, Cecilia Tan, Carol Taylor, Dana Vachon, Veronica Vera, Susan Wright, Zane and many others. The series has gotten press attention from the New York Times’s UrbanEye, Escape (Hong Kong), Flavorpill, The L Magazine, New York Magazine, New York Observer, Philadelphia City Paper, Time Out New York, Flavorwire, Gothamist, Jezebel.com, Nerve.com and Wonkette, and has been praised by Dr. Ruth.

Wickham Boyle, known as Wicki, wears many hats: writer, journalist, consultant and theater producer. As well as writing about sex and all things erotic, Boyle has written numerous articles on finance, parenting and travel for The New York Times, Savoy, National Geographic, Budget Travel, Real Simple, Gotham, Grace and the Downtown Express. She was one of the founders of Code Magazine, and editor-in-chief of Thrive, a magazine launched in late 2006 dedicated to the baby boom generation. Her essays can be heard on the AARP radio stations during their Prime Time show. Her erotic stories can be found in numerous collections published by Dutton, including the groundbreaking Pleasures and The Erotic Edge.



Rachel Kramer Bussel is an author, editor, blogger and reading series host. She is Senior Editor at Penthouse Variations and a former sex columnist for The Village Voice. She’s edited numerous anthologies, two of which (Up All Night and Glamour Girls) have been Lambda Literary Award finalists, most recently The Mile High Club: Plane Sex Stories, Do Not Disturb: Hotel Sex Stories, Best Sex Writing 2009, Tasting Him, Tasting Her, and Spanked. Her writing been published in publications such as Clean Sheets, Cosmopolitan, The Daily Beast, Fresh Yarn, Huffington Post, Mediabistro, Newsday, New York Post, San Francisco Chronicle, Tango, The Village Voice, and Time Out New York, and in over 100 anthologies, including Best American Erotica 2004 and 2006. She has hosted In The Flesh since October 2005.
www.rachelkramerbussel.com


photo by Hilary McHone

Megan Carpentier is a freelancer writer whose work has appeared on Jezebel.com, Wonkette, The Daily Beast, Glamour's blog Glamocracy, Foreign Policy's Madame Secretary blog, Ms., the Washington Post and Radar. Most of that was not about sex. Before she was an underemployed writer, she was an over-educated, mostly-inebriated lobbyist with a bad attitude and a foul mouth.
chaoticmegan.blogspot.com



Maria Diaz is a freelance pop culture and geekery writer based out of New Jersey and once in a while, New York City. She writes the blog BravoFan.com for b5media and is a contributer to British women's blog BitchBuzz. "Room 3025" from The Lust Chronicles was her first published story ever. She is currently working on a fiction zine of dark, sexy stories called Musical Beds. Her personal blog is at MariaDiaz.org.


photo by Amber Wolf

Mike Edison is the former publisher of High Times, a Hustler and Penthouse scribe, the former editor-in-chief of Screw magazine, and author of the memoir I Have Fun Everywhere I Go, plus 28 pornographic novel. In addition, he is known for his eclectic music career, and has collaborated frequently with noted wildmen Jon Spencer and GG Allin. He currently fronts his long-running gospel-blues-punk experiment the Edison Rocket Train, as well as his larger group, the Rocket Train Delta Science Arkestra. He lives and works in New York City.
www.mikeedison.com



Melissa Gira (“jee-rha”) Grant writes about sex & the internet at her award-winning blog, Sexerati. She is a contributor to Black Book and Gawker, and a columnist for $pread magazine. Her essays and reporting appear in Dirty Girls, Best Sex Writing 2008, Valleywag, RH Reality Check, and in Make: magazine & The Frisky. She lives in Brooklyn.
www.melissagira.com



Blaise Allysen Kearsley (also known as Blaise K because she is lazy) is the creator, curator and host of the How I Learned Reading Series at Happy Ending. She is also a writer, photographer and veteran blogger (who doesn't really blog anymore, actually). She has appeared at PS 122, Lolita, Bowery Poetry Club, Freddy's, Lucky 13 and Collective Unconscious. Between her writing and photography she has been featured in Nerve, Vice, Gawker, Gothamist, The Morning News, The Black Table, Jetpac magazine and Playbill, among others, as well as in the books Mortified and Cringe. She believes 2009 might be the year she finally finishes writing her novel, but she also has a lot of YouTube videos to catch up on. You can still stalk her former blog persona at www.bazima.com. (Bazima rhymes with vagina.)

True Sex Confessions are back July 16th!

Since the infamous April 2006 True Sex Confessions reading at In The Flesh with Jessica Cutler, Josh Kilmer-Purcell, Dan Allen, Felicia Sullivan, Miriam Datskovsky and Judy McGuire, True Sex Confessions Night has proven the most popular of the In The Flesh theme nights, with audience participation and hot/wild/crazy/fun/disturbing/unforgettable true sex stories. And producing this amazing photo:


Josh Kilmer-Purcell and Jessica Cutler vamp at True Sex Confessions Night, April 19, 2006

We're back, with an amazing lineup - bios TK.



IN THE FLESH EROTIC READING SERIES
TRUE SEX CONFESSIONS NIGHT
July 16th at 8 PM (doors at 7; we recommend arriving by 7:30 for a seat)
AT HAPPY ENDING LOUNGE, 302 BROOME STREET, NYC
(B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey or F/V to 2nd Avenue, http://www.happyendinglounge.com)
Between Forsyth & Eldridge. Look for the hot pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club."
Admission: Free
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676
http://inthefleshreadingseries.blogspot.com

In The Flesh is bringing back our most popular segment, True Sex Confessions Night! Featuring memoirist Lily Burana (I Love a Man in Uniform, Strip City), Mike Edison (I Have Fun Everywhere I Go), Melissa Gira Grant (Sexerati.com), Megan Carpentier (Jezebel.com), Blaise K (How I Learned Reading Series), and Maria Diaz. Hosted and curated by Rachel Kramer Bussel (Best Sex Writing 2009, The Mile High Club, Spanked). Free candy, cookies, chips and 100 mini cupcakes by Baked by Melissa will be served. Authors' book swill be available for sale by Mobile Libris. Audience members will have the opportunity to anonymously share their true sex confessions throughout the night (via index cards that will be read aloud between readers). Free copies of the word game SexySlang will be given away.

In the Flesh is a monthly reading series hosted at the appropriately named Happy Ending Lounge, and features the country's best erotic writers sharing stories to get you hot and bothered, hosted and curated by acclaimed erotic writer and editor Rachel Kramer Bussel. From erotic poetry to down and dirty smut, these authors get naked on the page and will make you lust after them and their words. Since its debut in October 2005, In the Flesh has featured such authors as Laura Antoniou, Mo Beasley, Susie Bright, Lily Burana, Jessica Cutler, Stephen Elliott, Valerie Frankel, Polly Frost, Gael Greene, Andy Horwitz, Debra Hyde, Maxim Jakubowski, Emily Scarlet Kramer of CAKE, Josh Kilmer-Purcell, Edith Layton, Logan Levkoff, Suzanne Portnoy, Sofia Quintero, M.J. Rose, Lauren Sanders, Danyel Smith, Grant Stoddard, Cecilia Tan, Carol Taylor, Dana Vachon, Veronica Vera, Susan Wright, Zane and many others. The series has gotten press attention from the New York Times’s UrbanEye, Escape (Hong Kong), Flavorpill, The L Magazine, New York Magazine, New York Observer, Philadelphia City Paper, Time Out New York, Flavorwire, Gothamist, Jezebel.com, Nerve.com and Wonkette, and has been praised by Dr. Ruth.