I'm in the middle of a lot of writing and editing deadlines and some projects are in the final final stages, which actually is always the toughest part, and some are partway through. Some are in the very glimmer of being an idea stages. I've bailed on more than one project past the 90% mark. Not gonna let that happen this time, but definitely hoping to pick up some writing speed like I used to have. And if they are all squared away in the next few weeks I will be a very happy editor indeed.
Anyway, in 2 weeks I go to Oregon for 4 days for a family event. Was just looking at my calendar and realized how ridiculous my schedule is. In those 2 weeks, I'm scheduled to:
Have a followup psychiatrist appointment
Eat pizza in a nearby state
Get a car service to a fancy meeting
Finally get a dresser at IKEA
Go to The Moth Business
Meet a fellow sex writer for the first time
Do an online chat
See 2 Fringe Festival shows
See The Talls at Second Stage Theatre
Have 2 sessions with my personal trainer
Appear on The Judy and Mike Show (yay Brooklyn - Roberta's Pizza is the best place I've ever been interviewed)
Have a macaroni and cheese cooking fest with a friend, in which we make 3 or 4 different kinds of mac and cheese
Attend Big Quiz Thing trivia
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say either some of these won't happen, I'm going to need a major caffeine upgrade, and/or by the time I get to Portland my friends are going to convince me to move there and be more mellow. I think part of the problem is that these are all things that I want to do, but when I see it all on my calendar I get overwhelmed and wonder how I'm going to get all my other obligations done too. We shall see. I'm making headway but this month is busy busy busy, trying to make up for last month's slacking.
I'm happy to have the work, bottom line, even when I fear I can't do it. "Face it/it's time you admit that you want to be here" goes a line in a song by The Reputation. And it's something I have to keep reminding myself of. I feel lucky and blessed to have so many opportunities, and I know that I'm the one who doubts my abilities the most. So I'm trying to forge ahead and do the best I possibly can, and admit when I need help. The latter is close to impossible for me, but I'm getting better.