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Lusty Lady

BLOG OF RACHEL KRAMER BUSSEL
Watch me talk about my debut as an author, Sex & Cupcakes: A Juicy Collection of Essays, in this Q&A with my publisher Thought Catalog Books

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

"Circumsized Guys Do It Better"

Yes, I said it. And yes, I do still write about sex once in a while. For Jewcy. Though I hope it's also clear that I'm not saying that's the #1 (or even 2 or 3) thing I look for. It's not, but if I had to choose, I have a strong preference. And while it was outside the scope of my essay, I have had a really great time with the uncircumcised men I've been with, and there were also other things going on that didn't involve penises (okay, yes, spanking and such). I'll shut up now and let you read the essay. If you want to comment on Jewcy (or here), that would be swell. I was seriously tempted to go the pseudonym route here too (see rebuttal), but I didn't, though I did revise a few details that I had overzealously added. Writing is, well, a challenge, especially writing about sex, and its potential impact on one's life, and it's a challenge I haven't quite puzzled out yet. Still working on that.

I’m not a man and am never going to be one, so I can’t speak to the experience of having a penis, but I can speak as someone who enjoys the sexual pleasures they can offer her. Being aroused by a lover happens not just when you’re together, but when you’re not. If the sex is good, it leaves you wanting more. It leaves you cooking up naughty scenes in your head. When you masturbate, he's right there with you, the memory of his body so vivid it’s almost like the real thing, at least for me. If a guy’s cock turns me off, I won't spend my free time fantasizing about it, even if the man himself makes me melt. It’s tough when I want to kiss every part of him but his penis.

Do also read Esther Goldberg's rebuttal, "Foreskins: bring 'em"

Also, like most girls, I am bad at giving hand jobs, and it's easier to jerk off someone whose dick-skin isn't already stretched tight as a drum.

As for the contention that uncircumcised penises are somehow uglier than circumcised ones, I guess I sort of understand where Rachel is coming from. A flaccid uncut dick can seem uncomfortably reminiscent of a sea cucumber or a shar-pei. But you know what? It's a penis, not a painting in an art museum. It's not there to be stared at for hours and admired, it's there to bone you. And also, once it's erect, it's usually hard to tell a circumcised from an uncircumcised penis, unless there is serious turtleneckage going on.


My question to you readers: Are most girls bad at giving hand jobs?

13 Comments:

At April 02, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I prefer when a man is circumsized. It could be due in part to some bad experiences I had earlier in life, but I think it's also that I think circumsized looks nicer, and I can really go to town when I'm giving a blow job.

In response to your question: I am bad at giving hand jobs. I'm not a man so I can't say if we all are, but I certainly am.

 
At April 02, 2008, Anonymous Okori said...

No. Most girls aren't bad at giving hand jobs.

However I might not be the best male voice on this subject, since i have not had one since 1997 and had not had any sexual contact of any kind since 2001 (not by choice.)

 
At April 02, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't mean to brag, but I was quite good at giving hand jobs to the one circumsized boyfriend I had. (I'm a girl and a lesbian now, just to clarify.) What I used to do was watch how the guy touched himself and then try to replicate that in the hand job. I don't think it's about gender so much, more about being a good study and being interested in giving pleasure to your partner. Just my two cents. Good article, by the way.

 
At April 02, 2008, Blogger Joel said...

there is a difference between admitting you have a superficial preference, and justifying the procedure because of it.

some men admit they like the look of fake boobs, but women should never be forced, at any age, to undergo such a procedure..

less than one half of one percent of men will EVER need a circumcision (or less). especially because there are much less severe methods to deal with potential problems, such as how women also have creams and such to deal with vagina-related problems.


now, i don't really know the difference between tugging on different penises besides my own, so i can't say for sure, but having a foreskin DEFINITELY makes all the difference to me, considering how effectively it gets used when i do.

this same movement has been said to create a less abrasive motion in the vagina, keeping things wetter and less painful!

also worth noting is that the foreskin contains thousands upon thousands of sensitive nerve-endings, not to mention the protective benefit it has, which keeps the head of the penis soft and sensitive over time.

we should NOT be allowed this procedure to be performed on young children! if some guy really thinks it will look better for him, he can go and have it done at any age.

if a girl likes circumcised guys exclusively, it would be more like a girl who likes guys with tattoos, or a prince albert piercing. she can go and find them on her own, but not have them done to her babies so some other girl with the same interests can also be pleased by it. i don't see justification in that.

 
At April 03, 2008, Anonymous mike in Albany said...

I know a guy who had a circumcision done as a middle-aged man. He says it feels much better during sex since he had it done, and his only regret is not getting it sooner.

 
At April 03, 2008, Anonymous Sue Katz said...

I have a friend who has written extensively on circumcision in the British Jewish community. One of her keys issues has to do with consent: the baby boys aren't asked for it and can't give it. Like any elective surgery, it should be up to the person getting the bit chopped off - not a matter of nonconsensual ritual.
Sue

 
At April 04, 2008, Blogger Joel said...

@mike

its likely your middle-aged friend had either a rare medical condition, or some alterior motive for getting a circumcision done.

i doubt he just randomly one day decided to get a circumcision done, and was then surprised to see that it was better than in his prior state.

i have also heard of men that severely regretted the fact that they were circumcised as adults, because the loss of sensation was so bad.

in the end, as long as it is an adult consenting to the procedure, i say go for it. its your body, you do what you want with it.

thats something i can't say about parents who are anxious to have it done to their sons. that i find really unfortunate and sad.

 
At April 04, 2008, Blogger The Millionaire's Anal Adventures said...

I don't know about this debate. As an uncircumcised guy it seem very weird to me. I suppose women have had a lifetime of objectification, but I think something that personal is not something we casually say we like or dislike.

 
At April 07, 2008, Anonymous Eathan I White said...

I must say most women aren't bad at hand jobs. The ones that are will take cues or suggestions easily. But if you find a woman who is bad at oral.. that's a bigger problem. It's tougher to give her suggestions on what is going to feel better.

ps. I'm curcumsized.. and i've always received compliments. Of course, I don't think that's because of the circumcision.

 
At April 08, 2008, Blogger Joel said...

@eathan

most women who take cues and suggestions at handjobs can take cues and suggestions at oral too.

i also think things can be just as much of a problem if she is terrible at either. (possible injuries-wise anyways)

if your compliments aren't because of the circumcision, than why did you feel the need to mention it?

 
At June 11, 2009, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I`prefer absolutly, circumsized boys.To the best,very tight. This boys are every time clean and odorless on her genitales. Never stinky,nasty foreskincheese!
The best for all boys,cut up the disgusting foreskin!

Sabrina said that!

 
At February 18, 2010, Blogger Bill said...

I was circumcised at 19 years old. I know the before and the after: circumcised is enormously better. All the men I knew who did their circumcision as adults have the same opinion.You don´t loose any sensitivity at all, you just loose that extreme sensitivity of the uncut penises, that produced the precocious ejaculations !
Bill

 
At February 18, 2010, Blogger Joel said...

Bill,

One doesn't need to chop off their hands to understand the value they serve still attached.

I would question the bias of a man who would have his hands chopped off at 19, as to what is better.

Though hands are an illustration which seem significantly more valuable than part of the penis, at least in performing daily tasks, I believe the analogy still holds value.

I don't need to cut off part of my penis to understand that it would remove a body part jammed full of nerve endings, that it would remove much of the mobile tissue that I enjoy, among other things.

It is a valued part of my anatomy.

If, for whatever reason, you do not value your foreskin, you are free to undergo a procedure at any age to have it removed.

There is no reason why parents should make a choice on behalf of a child under the assumption that they will want it removed. Most of the world hasn't had it done, and prefers it that way.

 

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