I would write, but I truly have very little to say, at least here. I should be like everyone else and start a secret blog, but don't have the energy. That's me, lately - so little energy. New York, much as I love it, well, it may be time to think about living elsewhere. Of course, it would take me at least a year to clear out my apartment, and I don't know of any other city as good for the non-drivers, I just have been feeling a bit worn down by this city, by myself, lately. It seems like there are so many events one "has" to go to, and at a certain point, I kindof wonder why. I wonder if I'm contributing to that by trying to run events myself, if maybe it would be better to be a bit more of a hermit and less of a social butterfly. Or rather, not try to be a social butterfly when I just wind up having the same old conversations that really don't mean anything.
I know I need to just get through the next little while, and I'll be okay, but of late, the whole fake it till you make thing isn't really working. I'm supposed to go to my first speed dating event tomorrow - this Time Out New York thing - and I probably will, if I can find something suitable to wear, but in the state I've been in recently, I'm not sure how well I'd fare. At the same time, I do need to break out of my social shell, because much as I love my friends (and I do! I do!), I also know that it is so easy to get so insular here that you never wind up meeting people who might break you out of that. Things will get better, I know, and I got through a few big things this week, with more looming, I just feel really off. I spent almost all of yesterday on my couch, dozing off and on, trying to be awake, alert, productive, but sometimes I just get so overwhelmed by, well, life, and I wonder how other people do it, how I'm supposed to get out of my messes, literal and otherwise. And if I've learned anything, it's that if you can't see the outcome, you can't envision a solution. So I am trying, baby step by baby step, to envision a solution to, for lack of a better word, me. I must go try to find some clothing that I like and wash my hair cause I'm gonna try to get my photo taken. If I like how I look, you'll see them. If not, next time...
In any case, I am going to Miami soon, so if you know anyone there, tell them to come to this reading - I have eaten more cupcakes in the last two months, more sugar overall, than I care to contemplate. They do truly start to lose their charm when they're ubiquitous, so while I will be nibbling, I will mostly be trying to find people to foist the cupcakes I am staking out there on (I have plans to visit 5-6 bakeries while I'm in town). Hence, I will be bringing cupcakes to Books & Books. Join us:
Lip Service 5!
True stories out loud.
The hottest, funniest, saddest, most real show in South Florida.
Rachel Aranoff, Andrea Askowitz, Jennifer Bartman, Joe Clifford,
Jaquira Diaz, Malvina Feinswog, Lori LaMedica, Steve Moss, and
special guest: New York sex writer Rachel Kramer Bussel
Saturday, Feb. 23rd, 7 p.m.
@ Books & Books, 265 Aragon Avenue, Coral Gables, 33134.
Show is free. Wine bar and music in the courtyard after the show.
Don’t miss it.
Check out http://www.lipservicestories.com for submission deadlines
and to hear stories from Lip Services past.