To steal a line from Josh Kilmer-Purcell . . .

I am not myself these days. (And yes, that's the name of his book)

Or, more accurately, I'm very much myself but that girl that everyone seems to think I am, who can somehow magically do everything and go out all the time and be all smiley and happy, well, that's kind my idealized self, who I am sometimes, but that's more who I wish I could be, and sometimes I just can't be that girl. It feels so fake and flat and stupid, like spackling on tons of makeup to cover up a zit which you know is there and can feel practically burning a hole in your skin. Maybe a terrible analogy since I don't get too many zits myself but whatever, the point is, the past few weeks have kicked my ass so much I just feel like I need to take a break.

So after Wednesday I really will be bunkering down, and so if I can't post your event or go to your event or hang out for a few months, I apologize in advance, but I've been kindof a terrible person and a slacker lately and need to sort out my head and get back on track so I don't hate myself. Kindof an oversimplified explanation, but that's all you really need to know. Hopefully, in a few months, I'll emerge feeling a lot better about myself and having accomplished something. And if not, at least I'll have saved some money and maybe will even investigate this whole online dating thing everyone's been urging on me. But first things first, as opposed to the way I've been doing it my whole life. Even this old chica can maybe learn to do things right.