utterly incapable

I'm so beyond on the verge of a nervous breakdown it's not even funny. The level of stress and overdue and memory overload and everything has just gone utterly beyond my grasp. Life goes on, I know, but sometimes I wish I really could escape for a good month or so. I'm sure it'll be fine but I think I have to start saying no to anything new and majorly catch up or I will collapse or kill myself or be jetting on a plane to somewhere far away very soon and may never return. I love New York but sometimes it's too much fucking work to survive here.